Mom Blog and Baby Blog | Baby Bunching

Best Holiday Gifts for the Baby Bunching Mom

This gift guide, courtesy of super-awesome guest poster Rachel, is a little late coming (our fault, she sent it months ago) but if you're anything like us you haven't even STARTED your shopping yet, so we hope you find it useful!  Super suggestions on what to add to your wishlist (or get the other Baby Bunching moms in your life).  Happy shopping!

1)      Pretty and comfortable nursing bra. If you are breastfeeding, and Baby Bunching, chances are you will not be back in your old lingerie for a while. So a well-fitted nursing bra is a must, and it might as well make you feel beautiful as well. I’m a no-frills type of gal, so a Playtex Womens Nursing Wirefree Bra is my favorite. Nothing fancy, but can be worn with anything, and it makes the girls look really good. However, others might enjoy more sexy, or colorful, and options abound!

2)      Babywearing equipment. This could be a sling, a backpack, a soft carrier, etc. In my opinion, this a must-have when Little Baby is still a tiny, floppy infant, and Big Baby is still a needy, clingy toddler. My personal favorite is the Beco Baby Carrier since it is all-day comfortable for mom and safe and secure for baby, though I usually recommend a simple one-piece sling like Hostlings to new moms.

3)      Baggies galore. I’m talking about cosmetic bags, waterproof ziplock bag alternatives, and any baggie with a zipper. These kind of baggies can turn any purse into a diaper bag, and can be easily transferred from one tote to another. Use a pretty one for all your personal items, and have it double as a clutch for quick trips sans offspring. Use a clear one as a diaper wallet, and never fumble over which size of diaper to pull out.  Or use a zipper bag to store snacks, or a spare set of clothes for the baby, or toys to keep everyone entertained, or the rocks your toddler insists on bringing home.

4)      Smartphone – iPhone, Android, it really doesn’t matter. As long as one of the items you never leave home without doubles as an entertainment system for Big Baby in a pinch; a smartphone has quickly become a must-have for many Baby Bunching mommies.

5)      Nice scarf. What else can serve as a fashion statement/nursing cover/burp cloth/breast leak hider? In a pinch, I’ve even used mine as a mat for changing diapers. Ask for something comfortable (not scratchy wool) and everyday (not silk or velvet) in an oblong shape for maximum usability.  I’ve found a print that incorporates lots of colors is the best, as it works with many different outfits and can hide your toddler’s marker stains as well.

6)      Trendy shades. Sunglasses care for your eyes, can make any outfit look better, and can be worn year-round. If you’re like me, and are constantly losing your shades, or breaking them and blaming your baby for it, then a $10 drugstore pair is as good as any. Just make sure to ask for BIG glasses, Baby Bunching mommy, as those are the kind that hide your dark-circled no-makeup eyes when you make that early morning diaper run.

7) Gift cards for comforting splurges, such as coffee shops, mani/pedi, spa treatments, movie tickets, etc.  Of course, you'd need a sitter to use these, which brings us to....

8) An evening (morning/afternoon/night) off. Let’s face it. For many of us, the best gift we can imagine is a break. This can also be the least expensive option for your younger college-aged sibling, or the favorite option for grandparents. In a life with two babies, “me” time can be harder to find than a good night’s rest, so several hours spent doing an enjoyable  activity qualifies as a good gift for any Baby Bunching mom.

C'mon and help us round out a solid list of ten ideas - what else is on your list?  Happy holidays to everyone, and may you enjoy the best little gifts in your life, your Bunch!

Rachel is a Baby Bunching mom of two beautiful daughters (3.5 years and 2 months) and a handsome son in between (2.5 years). She loves giving and receiving gifts, but is guilt-ridden about spending money.

a monster birthday party

It's birthday season, and we're always asked how to plan a birthday party for your Bunch. If you kids share a birthday month, it means they are either 1 or 2 years apart, right? And it would seem when the kids are little, you could knock both parties out in one fell swoop.

I smiled this morning when I ran across the fantastic party idea on my favorite party site Hip Hip Hooray. But when I popped over to Nounces Design where the idea originated from, I giggled because the concept is genius for Baby Bunchers and even better, Jennifer's planned the whole party for you complete with all her own Printable Monster Party Collection, which barely require you to leave the house to find all the invitations and thanks yous. Even better!

Think of all the possibilities with this them.

(Photo courtesy of Nounces Design.)

entertaining without losing your sanity

By Erin Brazofsky

In the past three weeks, we have celebrated Seth’s dedication, an early birthday celebration for Levi, Easter and Levi’s actual birthday. This has amounted to a large amount of planning, preparation and executing for successful events that have involved family and friends. Not to mention keeping my husband and two little rock star babies fed, clothed and happy. Let’s just say I learned much.

Keeping my sanity throughout was also a huge goal and one that wasn’t easy to achieve, unfortunately. I don’t like to give up control of things, and asking for help isn’t my best quality. That being said, here are the biggest lessons I have learned in our whirly-gig of “fun” events.

Simplicity is key. Planning lunch for both your and your husband’s families after a baby dedication? Depending on the weather, BBQ it up! Despite chilly temps and a drizzle falling, my wonderful husband grilled burgers and hot dogs in the garage (well ventilated) with my father and his brother. Everything left for me to do was easy-peasy. Chips, potato salad I made the day before and toppings took about 5 minutes to lay out. Dishes? Paper plates and plastic cups made clean up a breeze. Dessert for 15+ people? Again, keep it simple: cupcakes I made were lovingly frosted by my mom and sister while I was doing other things. Get some ice cream and self-serve. Providing dinner for out-of-town guests the night before? Order pizza and slice up some veggies and call it a day. Voila! Baby dedication/family birthday celebration complete.

Have your guests contribute to the meal. Every Easter, we host our friends who, like us, don’t have family nearby, and it is a wonderful time. To keep things stress-free for me, I ask my girlfriends to contribute side dishes, desserts or drinks to our Easter meal. Then I’m not slaving in the kitchen all day, and I get to enjoy someone else’s cooking. It’s definitely a win-win.

Don’t sweat the small stuff. So maybe you haven’t given your house a complete and thorough scrub down for a week or two (or a month, let’s be honest). You’re a busy lady…kids, husband, life… Instead of running around your house with a broom and dust pan behind every one, give yourself a break. No one will notice the dirt you see, and if you are a little more relaxed, it will go a long way for your family and friends. I was able to enjoy our crazy few weeks so much more because I allowed myself to be content with spot cleaning as needed.

Tell your husband when you need a break. You do not have to be Superwoman. He is there to help, and if he’s like my husband, he wants to help so that you don’t lose your mind. And, let’s face it; he is the co-host of these events, right? Let him help you.

So, relax, take a deep breath and remember to soak in these fun moments and times with those you love. I promise you, (and I speak from experience) it is worth it.

Erin has two sons Levi (age 2) and Seth (7 months).

a baby buncher's new years resolutions

Neither of us are big into resolutions. Most people won't make it past February without going back to their old ways. But it's a good way to talk about the changes we all want to make. Here are a few Baby Bunching resolutions--most of us--can all ponder for 2011.

1.  To identify and utilize every possible drive-thru service in town.

2.  To take lots of photos of my Bunch and upload them to my hard drive/photo sharing service regularly, even if I won't get around to ordering prints for five years.

3.  To offer support and advice to other Bunchers whenever I can, and to actively seek out the advice and support of others who have gone before me.  

4.  To carefully consider every purchase and minimize the amount of baby gear, clothes, and toys I bring into my life.  More stuff=more mess=more work=more anxiety.

5.  To take the money I saved on stuff and use it to treat myself to a baby sitter or a house cleaner once in awhile, so that I can spend more quality time on myself or my kids.

6.  To make loving my husband a priority and not simply treat him as an extra set of hands walking in the door at 5:30.

7.  To learn to let the little things go when I can. Chores will always be there.  Kids are only little once so enjoy the time now before they get older and prefer their friends to me.
8.   To not have another baby - at least this year.

last minute crunch with your bunch

We must be the only school district around with school that goes until Wednesday. But you won't hear me complaining since I can get the last minute chores done before the whole family descends upon my house. But if your kids are out from school and you're wondering how to get everything done with your Bunch, fear not as we have an annual tradition of providing you a few quick tips to survive the last few days before Christmas.

If you're needing to get out and about this week to get last-minute gifts, send packages or plan your holiday menu, going with your two toddlers could make it a bit tricky. So here are a few suggestions to get you through:  

1) Get a sitter (even if it's for one kid)! Beg a neighbor to trade off on babysitting favors for one morning and high tail it around town like a mad woman. Make sure you have a list and group your errands for the most efficiency. If you can't arrange a babysitting swap, bring a mother's helper along with you ($5 an hour or so). She can at least trail behind you with the kids and feed them snacks while you shimmy through Target at light speed. But try to unload at least one kid with someone else. We promise this will make life easier!

2) Splurge on a fun coffee drink. My choice is always a Starbucks Peppermint Mocha. For $3 or so, if that will put me in the right frame of mine to deal with the rush and my Bunch whining about this and that, I say it's worth it.

3) Fa la la la from place to place. Yes, add a little caroling to your car to help lighten the mood (both theirs and yours).

4) Bribe them with lunch. Chick fil A is our preferred Christmas rush treat. We never go there and they love the idea of something fun for them when we're done.

5) Or if all else fails, wait until evening and collect a few other Baby Bunching moms and make a girl's night out of Christmas chaos then get drinks afterwards.

Best of luck getting it all done this week!

baby bunching during the holidays: permission to simplify

You may have already noticed that the frequency of our posts are slowing up a little heading into this crazy time of year.  Or more likely, you haven't noticed at all because your own life is so crazy during this season that you don't have time to be bothered with our lives. 

In any case, the holiday season is both a blessed and tricky time of year for moms of Baby Bunches of all ages.  Is it just us or does it seem like the daily life of a Buncher is complicated enough without the addition of major machinations required to pull off the holiday season of yours (or your Bunch's) dreams?

Of course, we love all the festivities deep (really deep) down in our hearts.  We're not so Scroogey that we would recommend ditching the season all together, but we DO recommend considering scaling back a little.  And we happily give you permission to do so.

Your children will not be this young forever and life will not be this crazy forever.  If you try to do it all, you may find yourself frustrated that the cookies are burned, the ornaments have been ripped off the tree and broken, and the toddler has spilled a (supposedly non-spill) sippy cup all over your almost-done Christmas cards (as happened to me just two days ago).  Our advice is just to go with it and embrace the madness.

So your tree looks like crap and your cookies taste even worse.  So what?!  If the kids have fun undoing doing the tree and they accidentally rip the wrapping off their presents days (or even weeks) early, does it really matter in the grand scheme of things?  Just re-hang the ornaments and re-wrap the gifts (putting them up high this time) and count your blessings that your kids are healthy enough to be so ornery.

We've done posts in the past on how to help your tree survive the holiday season, but we've got a few tips for helping you survive as well.

1.  Simplify.  Don't bake up a storm AND send cards to every person you know AND decorate your home like a show house AND wrap gifts worthy of Martha Stewart's blessing.  Just pick your favorite thing and knock it out of the park - and enjoy yourself doing it.  Let the rest slide.

2.  Speaking of simplification, the easiest thing to simplify is your Bunches' gift list.  Really.  They are 1 and 2 (or 2 and 3).  Even if they're 5 and 6, they're likely getting so much stuff from grandparents and other relatives that they're not even gonna notice if there's just a few well-chosen items under the tree from you.  Honestly, the younger they are, the less we recommend you buy.  Babies adore an empty box and cast-off wrapping paper (toddlers prefer noisy bubble wrap) from other people's gifts to any gift you can buy them.  Plus they get overwhelmed easily and lose interest in opening after just a few gifts!  Save your money for when they're older - they'll be asking for the moon soon enough.

3.  With the money saved from gifts, get yourself an sitter elf.  Even just a few hours to address cards uninterrupted, bake a batch of cookies without little people underfoot, or run to the post office without your "assistants" can help holiday stress levels plummet.  And we hope that you have your sitter booked for the company party already.  Cuz you totally deserve a fun night out with the hubs.

4.  Ditch the mental picture of perfection.  Because it's very likely that even IF you manage to get it together and get it all done, someone is going to get sick and throw a wrench into the works.  In six years of parenting, I have yet to escape a Thanksgiving/Christmas season without a holiday trip to urgent care.  I've spent 3 of those 6 years taking shifts sitting up with a stuff-nosed baby or toddler and feeling so grateful that there were relatives in town to take sleepless shifts as well.  

No, the holidays aren't always perfect, but they're ALWAYS memorable.  Embrace it!  And happy memory-making this holiday season!

baby bunching Q/A: the thanksgiving table

Q: How do you keep 2+ kids occupied/entertained at the Thanksgiving table long enough to eat your own food? Seems like just as I finish serving the kids and finally sit down after having to get up 50 times to refill sippy cups, get new utensils to replace the ones thrown on the floor, etc, the kids are ready to take off. I'd like to sit down all together as a family, but maybe this is just a ridiculous fantasy?

A: Good luck! Depending on the age, this might be hard to do. But here are a few things to keep in mind:

1) If you have family surrounding you for this special day, take advantage and give them kid duty. Make Uncle Joe be in charge of one kid and put Grandma with the baby. Have them play sippy cup fetch with the kids or play another round of Uno. It hasn't grown old for them yet.

2) There should be enough food variety for any picky kid to take some time to explore new flavors and textures at the table. Isn't that why we make 20 dishes for 10 people? They should be busy mashing up potatoes with their fingers in a bowl or rolling some green beans around. Just let them if they are happy and behaved enough so you can eat. (As a side note, just found this cute article about kid-friendly side dishes for Thanksgiving.)

3) Get everyone to the table, put the food on, say your blessings, snap your photo and let it go. If the kids are running around while you eat, have a glass of wine and enjoy the fact that you have extra hands to help you clean up later.

4) Keep in mind it is what it is. Whatever Martha-like Thanksgivings you've had in the past, realize you may not see these again for a very long time. Take the china and crystal away from the 2-year old and explain to your mom again why it's not going to work. If the kids are misbehaving and talking when the grown ups are, remind Grandpa that they are 2 and 3 and there's not much you can do about it. Send your cousin to play with the kids and do dinner in shifts. Heck, that's part of being a family.

Chances are it will never be as bad as you think. It's Thanksgiving. People expect chaos and mess and still feel a sense of fulfillment afterwards. In fact, Thanksgiving may be a metaphor for Baby Bunching.

Have a great holiday!

baby bunching Q/A: best stroller option for the airport

If you are one of the lucky Bunchers who will be traveling by air this holiday season, which begins next week by the way, you may be struggling with what kind of stroller to bring. We have received multiple versions of this question in the last week.

Q: I need some advice for traveling with my Bunch. We are heading cross country in a month and are staying for 2 weeks. My boys will be 1 year old, and just over 2. We are flying from VA and connect in Chicago. My double is a Baby Jogger Classic, and it's just way to huge and heavy to fly with. The last time we did this we brought the single Zooper and I wore the little one, but that was when he was 4 months old, he's to heavy for all day baby wearing now. I'm considering getting another travel stroller before we leave. Any suggestions? Should I get another double, or maybe just an umbrella single, since I'll be traveling with my husband?

A: Most importantly, you need some way to secure and transport all member of your Bunch. In these days of tight luggage restrictions, you may be tempted to forgo a stroller if your kids are big enough to walk.  Do not delude yourself into thinking that your two year old, who behaves like an angel at the mall, is going to happily hold your hand and walk through five airport terminals to get to the gate.  Even the most well-behaved toddler will either bolt or refuse to walk in this situation.  Your mode of transportation will depend on the ages of your kids.  When the baby was very tiny, we found it most convenient to throw him in a Baby Bjorn and put the big baby in the stroller.  When they got a little older, the double stroller became handy.  

However, a double stroller is not necessary, and may not even be preferrable for airport travel. If your youngest is younger than 1, you might try some kind of backpacky like thing (a Kelty or even the Ergo). But we support two umbrella strollers if in doubt. Why? They are cheap, light and can pass through most doorways and into bathroom stalls without too much issue.  

So yes, our recommendation on this one is to take your single and get another single umbrella or just suck it up and get two umbrellas to save yourself the headache of ruining your current single. With more and more people gate checking last minute large bags, the baggage guys probably have less patience for any precious strollers that come their way. They will be flung on like the rest of the luggage. Since you're staying for 2 weeks you will probably need a way to transport babes once you're there so if someone else will be with you at all times, go for the two singles. If not, you may need to reconsider a double on the other end.

However, if you're looking for an "excuse" for a new stroller (like we need one of those) this new one from Maxi Cosi might be a fun option and one that you can use after the airport nonsense. Or if you are insisting on a double, a Sit n' Stand might provide you with some options along the way. Linda personally bought a double Jeep twin lightweight stroller for an international trip five years ago. The thing was light and easy to collapse, but the first trip across the Atlantic resulted in a casualty that meant the thing never folded right again. 

leave the photography to the experts

Rachel's post last week about toddler portrait roulette was a familiar scene for both of us. Every year we struggle with the entire process: clothing, timing, the actual event, choosing a photo where everyone doesn't look like freaks--you get the idea.

But we have an idea that might make this process better for everyone. There's still some time before the final holiday dash begins so perhaps there is a way to get the photo you want without the tears and have some fun with friends. Yep, you read that right. Two years ago my Baby Bunching friend Susan (four kids under 6) arranged for her favorite photographer to come to her house in her beautiful back yard. She booked him for the entire day. Each of us signed up for 45-minute slots with the photographer. This was a perfect solution for my family. We had her house for bathroom trips or clothing changes, as well as a few snacks she put out for us. The overlap in times allowed moms to actually visit and the kids could play a bit on either end.

By booking him for the whole day and guaranteeing business, the sitting fee was only $40 per person and that included 2-3 sheets of photos + the whole disk of the photos. After that, we were free to order whatever we liked.

And the results....were beautiful. Having kids relaxed in an outside environment with good friends to share in what could be a stressful event made it all that much better.

If you're a photographer and like this idea, feel free to leave your business info here for people to contact you.

baby bunching Q/A: solo travel with 2 under 2

Question via FB from reader Marilyn.  Cara takes this one, as she has traveled with her Bunch and the Caboose a fair bit, both solo and with extra hands.

Q: Any tips on flying with 2 under 2 without my spouse? This 4 hr flight is going to be the longest flight of my life!

A:The first thing to remember is that your mantra for the flight is "This, too, shall pass."  No matter how bad things get, keep repeating this yourself.  While 4 hours is eternity when you're managing two babies in a confined space on your own, it's a blip in the grand scheme of things.  And be sure to keep your sense of humor.  Because sometimes, you gotta laugh or you'll cry.  Attitude is everything when flying solo!

We did a post awhile back on this topic, so we've linked to that for you.  It pretty much boils down to this:

1) The more tools (i.e. strollers and car seats) you bring to keep babies restrained, the better.  If you're traveling by yourself, you can only have one lap baby even if they are both under 2, so you have to buy one seat - bring a car seat for it.  Double stroller is a must, unless you have an infant carrier or sling of some sort - in which case, umbrella stroller for Big is preferred, with Baby strapped on to you, leaving your hands free to maneuver kids, strollers and car seats.  You may have multiple kids screaming at once, but it's always better if one of them is strapped in as opposed to wiggling (or worse, running) around on a plane or in the airport.

2) Allow PLENTY of extra time for checking baggage, getting through security, boarding, etc.  Like double the time you think you need.  Plan for the desk agents to act like they have never seen a carried-on OR checked car seat before and attempt charge you for it (even though most airlines don't).  Get to the airport early, go straight through security.  Get on the plane first, get off last.  Get There Early and Take a Leisurely Pace is your middle name this trip.

3) Hire help.  If you're on your own to drive there, do Park-N-Ride and take a bus to the terminal.  The nice little bus driver/porter will handle all of your baggage for a small tip.  Curb check the luggage - don't stand in line.  It's well worth the daily parking fee and the extra $2-$5 a bag to have someone else take care of bags.  With two kids, you have enough to take care of.

4) The two worst parts of traveling solo are security and boarding/de-boarding the plane.  TSA and flight attendants are useless.  Fellow passengers may or may not take pity on you, but you don't really want them touching your kids, so that's fine.  Do yourself a favor and check all bags except for the diaper bag so you don't have to hoist anything into the overhead bin while dealing with a car seat, a toddler, and a baby in a Snugli.   Do whatever you can to minimize carry-ons, whether that means paying the checked bag fee or wearing the same outfit all week.

5) Speaking of carry-ons, yours are for your kids and not you.  You need your ID and wallet, and maybe some lipstick.  Leave your romance novels and iPod at home - no time for that. Stuff the carry-ons with snacks, diapers (pack double what you need in case of unexpected flight delays), loveys, extra outfits for everyone and distractions for your Bunch.

6)Put everyone in a diaper or Pull-Up.  It sucks if you are potty-training your toddler, but a 4-hour flight is not the time to put potty training skills to the test.  If your Big has to go, the chances of you fitting in the small airplane bathroom with her (not to mention Baby strapped to your chest) are slim.  So go before you get on the plane, but put on a Pull-Up for backup, just in case.

May The Force be with you.  And remember - this, too, shall pass!