Mom Blog and Baby Blog | Baby Bunching

quitting thumb-sucking: it's not just hard on kids

When my kids were newborns, I clung fervently to the almighty pacifier as a soother  - even learning to tuck the bottom half right into their "baby burrito" swaddling at night to encourage it to stay in place.  As they grew from sleepy newborns into active infants and the paci kept slipping out and waking them up, I prayed that they would find their thumb/fingers and learn to self-soothe and GO BACK TO SLEEP.  As a recovering thumb-sucker myself, I knew even in that moment that it would be far easier to ditch the paci than the thumb as they got older, but I didn't care one whit.  All I knew was that life had become one constant stream of babies  and I needed a good night's sleep and if it meant I had to saw my first grader's hand off at the wrist someday to cure him of thumb-sucking, so be it.

Fast forward to first (ok, second) grade.  I've got two thumb suckers with loveys and a finger sucker without a lovey, and it's abundantly clear that amputation is not an option.  Time to pay the piper for my past parenting misdeeds.

With my two thumb suckers, the sucking is tied to the lovey and we've made some half-hearted attempts to hide/dispose of lovey during the day but can't bring ourselves to law down the law at night. My own thumb snuck into my mouth at night long after I'd been fitted with braces to correct damage done earlier by said intruder.  So I have every sympathy when my oldest sobs that he "just can't take it" if he can't suck his thumb while he goes to sleep.  

Our finger sucker isn't tied to anything - except his fingers.  All. day. long.  The best we've been able to come up with for him is the pretty much constant admonition to "take your fingers out of your mouth" and "keep your hands busy so they don't creep into your mouth!"  To the point where I'm sure he wants to keep his hands busy by beating us with sticks so that we'll shut up and leave him alone. 

To make matters worse, our pediatric dentists seem fairly unconcerned about either the thumb or finger sucking, although they both said that if we felt like worrying about it, finger sucking is actually worse in terms of tooth displacement.  The fact that my dentists aren't concerned gives me false permission to carry on about my ways, believing that they will eventually "grow out of it". Which I know for a fact is total BS, based on my personal experiences that a well-sucked thumb is tough as leather and even a mouth full of metal is no match for a thumb determined to find it's way home.

Part of me knows I need to lay down the law, and the other part of me, quite honestly, doesn't want my babies to grow up.  I can remember when their threadbare loveys were pristine new baby gifts and I was able to snuggle both lovey and baby right up to my chest.  Now, the sheer stench of my oldest son's feet keeps me from wanting to snuggle him, even if he could still fit on my lap.  And The Caboose has officially reached the age where I try to pull him into my lap and he squirms to break free instead of snuggling in. With the exception of the Pull-Ups on The Caboose, the thumb/finger sucking is the last vestige of "baby" in this house.  

Since we've obviously missed the window on the whole "they'll lose interest as they get older and quit on their own" time-line for my two bigger boys, we're gonna go the orthodontic route.  Biggest boy will be heading in for a spacer, which, the dentist says, will make it so difficult to suck his thumb that he'll probably quit.  My guess is that in another year, Middle will be sent for one as well.  Meanwhile, I'm hoping I can salvage The (just turned three year old) Caboose and cure him using natural methods.  Does anyone out there have tips for quitting thumb-sucking that worked for you? Because I suck at this.

 

baby bunches bunking up - how to handle sharing rooms

When my Bunch was very young, we had the luxury of separate bedrooms for each baby and this was a LIFESAVER in the early days.  But once their younger brother came along, they were forced to bunk together due to a shortage of bedrooms.  We've moved three times in the three years since The Caboose was born (long story) and each time, the bedroom configurations have necessitated room sharing, but the roommate configurations have actually shifted due to a variety of factors (ages, sleep schedules, child's propensity to goof off and rile his roommate, etc.).

We're now in what we hope will be our "forever" (or at least long-time) house and while we have the space for each boy to have his own room, we opted to reclaim our study/office and our Bunch is back to bunking together.  My guess is in a few months, The Caboose will realize he's being cheated out of bedtime shenanigans with brothers and the eldest will be sick of his little brothers in his stuff, and we'll play musical beds once again.  But 2 of the 3 will always be roommates.  

Now, room sharing with bigger kids is one thing, but room sharing with babies and toddlers and all of their various special sleep needs is a whole 'nother ball of wax.  I will admit that the only time we shared rooms in the early years was when we were forced to while traveling (and even then, we would literally stick a pack-and-play in the bathroom to ensure that each baby had their own separate 4 walls).  But lots of moms do it and make it work.  Here are a few tips we've picked up over the years for roommates of all ages.

• Always put your two best sleepers together OR the ones that are on the closest sleep schedules (dictated by nap or school schedules, usually), to minimize the accidental wake-up calls.
• If you've got babies/toddlers rooming together, get a white noise machine so one doesn't wake the other with crying.  Many little ones tend to sleep like logs - once they're down.  It's getting them down that's the tricky part...
• Speaking of that, stagger bedtimes and get the easiest or youngest child settled first (depending on the temperments of your kiddos).  Get one out like a light, crank up the white noise, and slide the other in.
• Daytime is a little harder because it tends to be light out, which encourages goofing off.  Darken as much as you can with darkening shades and stagger nap times like bedtime.  If all else fails, consider letting the oldest child nap somewhere else - either in mom and dad's bed or a pack-and-play or in a baby-proofed room with a baby gate across the door.  Too-few bedrooms mandates flexibility on everyone's part, including mom.
• If you've got more than two kids, be flexible on configurations.  Depending on ages and genders, while your first instinct may be to put all older kids in one room or all girls in one room, that may not actually be what makes the most sense.  And as kids get older and sleep habits/needs change, consider revisiting roommate arrangements - they're not set in stone forever.
• Finally, be patient.  Even if you have superstar sleepers, introducing a change in any routine is going to involve patience.  But keep in mind that kids have shared rooms since the beginning of time, and many of them are closer for it!  They'll survive and you will, too!

the connection between (lack of) sleep and "baby brain"

A recently released study confirms what we moms have long known - that the "baby brain" attributed to sleep deprivation is a very, very real thing.  Although the study was conducted with frequently-woken mice, sleep researchers say that it's not too big of a leap to extend the findings to humans, who experience a mental fog that undermines our ability to think clearly when we have not gotten enough sleep.

When my oldest was born, I remember being shocked at how little sleep I required to function. Those first few weeks of wakings every 1-3 hours were brutal, but I was lucky that each of my little ones fell into decent 4-hour stretches by about one month.  For the most part, I found that if was able to get 5 consecutive hours of sleep and a gallon of caffeine a day, I was good to go.  Sure, I'd get tired, but when the occasional bout of infant illness or teething tossed me back into 2-hour sleep cycles, I was once again grateful for the pathetic 5-hour stretch.

As it turned out, becoming a mom has changed my sleep cycle permanently.  Never a "night owl", I found that I was able to stay up later post-baby and now my most productive hours are between 8 pm (once the kids are down) and 1 am.  As a hyper Type-A personality, I've frequently felt that sleeping, along with eating, are two of life's biggest time wasters, so I was thrilled to discover that the (lack of) sleep training I received from having 3 babies in 5 years has translated to increased productivity. I can now function on 5 hours of sleep a night instead of 8, a time savings that translates into an extra 21 hours a week!  I can do this for exactly 3 consecutive weeks - and then I crash.  

Instead of cluing in to how BAD this is for my body, I'm content to function in 3-week cycles for the sake of squeezing more work, volunteering, blogging (sometimes), and chores into my days.  Never mind the fact that my memory for details is shot, half the time I call my kids by each other's names, and I can frequently be found driving down my street with a forgotten travel coffee mug on the roof of my van.  To each their own, I say.

How has becoming a mom changed your sleep needs, for better or for worse?

just the right jogging stroller a must for baby bunchers on the run

In seven years of parenting, I am loathe to admit that although I've used the heck out of my assorted jogging strollers, I've only actually used them to jog once or twice.  This is due to a host of excuses reasons (I'm tall so the stroller interferes with my stride, I cheaped out and went with BabyTrend joggers which are great for walking but not so great for running, the stroller always veers slightly to the left  - probably because I cheaped out, and most importantly - I could barely ever propel my running self forward more less two additional smaller selves).  

Having hit my "life" stride in recent months, I've also gotten back into my workout groove and have a nice running routine in place.  Not coincidentally, the biggest two of my Bunch are onto scooter phase (less babies=more personal time, are you serious - who knew?!?!).  Now that I'm downsized back into the single jogger AND in better shape, I decided to strap the Caboose into the jogger this morning and venture out to my favorite running spot. He proceeded to cling to the sides of the stroller in fear howling, "It's rolling too fast!  It's rolling too fast!"  It was amateur hour on the running trail this morning, let me tell you.

This morning's exercise left me wondering - if I'd known then what I know now when I bought my very first BabyTrend jogger (because it was the most affordable one available), would I have invested a little more in a higher quality stroller to assist with ease of workouts?  I see lots and lots of moms on the trail with double joggers (mostly of the BOB variety, although I know Linda adored her Mountain Buggy), so I know that there are some of you out there that can both stick to a workout routine with two babies AND integrate them into said routine.  My hat is off to you in a MAJOR way.  

Y'all know one of our favorite topics here at Baby Bunching is strollers, so do tell - what's your favorite jogging/workout stroller and why?  And is it worth the splurge to get a stroller that works WITH you instead of against you in your workout?

baby bunching Q/A: exhausting your toddler

This question arrived just in time for our weekly Q&A.

Q: I have an 18 month old & 2 month old. My question is how do exercise your older child when you're alone with both? Before my daughter was born I'd take my son to the playground & he did a class at The Little Gym. Now he isn't getting the physical activity he once got & it seems to be affecting his ability to sleep. All feedback is greatly appreciated!

A: Oh, we never want anything to interfere with anyone's sleep so let's get on this question. First off, unless you're going to get a sitter, skip places like Little Gym with your toddler for a long while (until you can get both kids into the same class). I have a very vivid memory of a Little Gym class with my 18-month old son and my daughter who was about the same age as yours in the Baby Bjorn screaming her head off. I never went back.

You have a few options here of places to visit with toddler and baby to exhaust your older one:

1) Playgrounds. Remember that not all playgrounds are created equal so find a very toddler-friendly one and do what you can in the great outdoors with baby in the stroller, sling or carrier. They may be shorter trips than you're used to, but meet up with some friends so you have some helps spotting your toddler. He'll be tired when he's done.

2) The pool. It's summer now and while your wee one may not be ready for fun in the sun your toddler would probably love the play in the baby pool. Get some fun toys for the pool, have the baby again in a carrier or stroller and go until someone gets fussy.

3) Nature centers, farms or gardens. Bring the stroller along and let your toddler just go hog wild by running. You may have to run to keep up with him, but he'll be exhausted.

4) Backyard playdate. Even if you don't have a backyard, you probably have a friend who does. I always found yards, with friends of course, to be the best exercise for me. That meant baby could hang out, be changed and fed in privacy without too much sprinting and we might even be able to enjoy a cup of coffee while they played.

 If you can't get out to exercise, have him help you fill the laundry basket with several trips back and forth or have your own at-home dance party. Remember that this phase is short and your toddler will exhaust from normal everyday stimulation. Before you know it you'll be chasing after him down the street as he takes off on his scooter with little one right behind. Then you'll be getting the exercise.

 

the juggle: mommy guilt is back

My kids are a year apart in school. There are some definite pros and cons to back-to-back teachers. However one of the cons is that both kids are able to easily track and remember what I attended, volunteered for or organized last year for child #1. Child #2 probably wouldn't care except child #1 always likes to remind her.

Tomorrow is the big kindergarten field trip to the zoo. I had missed the fall field trip to the pumpkin farm last year and managed to rally my work schedule to be gone the whole day in the spring for the National Zoo. To make it even, I did the same this year. No pumpkin patch in the fall, but the zoo in the spring. Only this year, work is way too busy for me to miss a whole day.

Now let me back up and remind you that I work from home with a kindergartner who attends only half day. That translates to 3 hours each day that I frantically work as much as I can so I can be available to both kids when they hop of the bus. Our spring break put me behind at work with a looming deadline and to be able to work for 5 hours without paying a babysitter just seemed to make sense.

I tossed it around in my head for days and finally came to the conclusion that it just didn't make sense to go on the field trip. Would she be disappointed? Would she even notice my absence once she was there? I have to keep reminding myself that all working parents--full time or part time--have to make choices. As I'm quickly learning, the older the kids get the more obligations we have. The more things they have to attend. The more things I have to attend. Three years ago when the only event I had be at was the Christmas program at preschool. Now the committments come at me at lightening speed for both kids. How equal do I make it? Is it a lesson for them that mom just can't do it all, all the time?

The decision has been made and I will be at home tomorrow working while child #2 is walking through the zoo with another devoted parent. I still can't help feeling guilty.

(For those that wanted to know, she was not initially disappointed, but I did manage to get a few tears this morning.)

common everyday illnesses: some tips to help you look before you leap

(Please remember once again, we are not doctors or at all related to the medical profession or even play one on TV. We just have lots of experience dealing with illness and doctors. Always consult your physician.)

Our family recently recovered from the illness of the month. This time it was strep. But it always seems to be something--stomach issues, fevers, congestion, sore throats.

While the remedies for all that ails us ranges from prescription meds to "wait it out," one thing is for certain--it sucks to see your kids sick and in pain.

Because of this, I think as parents we sometimes tend to leap before we look. And it never fails to surprise me that year after year, the more experienced (one would think) I get with illness, I still leap too soon.

In reflection on this past bout of sickness, I'd like to share some wisdom I've gained over the past few years to save some of you the hassle of leaping before you look, observe and consult. And my hope is that many of you will chime in as well, since this is collective knowledge.

1) Not all fevers are bad. Thanks to a very helpful nurse very early on, I was reassured that fevers are a sign of fighting infection. A high fever (even up to 104 in toddlers) while a sign of sickness doesn't usually warrant the response I usually have. Which is something like "Oh my God. My kid's brain is going to bake." Apparently, that's not true. My latest doctor told me it bakes around 108. Always good knowledge to have.

2) Tylenol and Motrin is a 'fever reducer' not a 'fever go-awayer.' I believed for many years that once you gave a kid meds the fever would disappear. Again if you have a 103 degree fever, chances are medicine isn't going to make it go away, but it will make it go down so your child can feel better. Whew!

3) Not all ear infections need prescription meds. This once shocked me as well. An ENT in Sweden informed me when my daughter had her second ear infection. The first she was four months old and had a ruptured ear drum and he thought that definitely called for antibiotics. However, four months later when she was struck with pain again, he assured me we had too many antibiotics in our community and that most were viral anyway and to wait it out. Floored by this response, I was surprised that four days later she was better. Now come to find out, doctors here in the states are following suit with a similar recommendation.

4) Strep throat is only the cause of  approximately 30% of sore throats.* I learned this little fact from the nice nurse at the CVS Minute Clinic. (By the way, if you don't know these, check them out!)  For any of you who have taken your preschooler to get one of these strep tests, you know that it sucks for them and you. So look before you leap on this one.

An added note on this: After you've had strep in your house a few times, you'll recognize the pungent smell that comes from it. Stick your child in a room for 5 minutes and come back, if it reeks of some awful bad breath smell, chances are it's strep.

5) Croup sounds scarier than it is. We are veterans of croup. But I am happy to say that after four years of annual croup visits, it has been a long time since that cough has resurfaced in our house. I promise you will panic the first time you hear this cough, and you might even make it to the doctor or ER for this one. But keeping your child calm and comfortable seems to be about the best medicine. There are the cases where you should take them if they can't breathe, obviously. We did have one of our trips to the ER that was semi-warranted, but they assured us that we probably could have gotten him calmed down enough to breathe regularly. 'Probably' wasn't good enough so we went. But that was our last trip to the ER for croup even though we had many more visits from the cough.

6) You'll only make one high-fever ER run. Again, like croup, a fever of 104 in the middle of the night will scare the bejeebers out of you. You'll pack up and fly out the door to the hospital only to be welcomed with a slew of blood work and tests that will make everyone upset and exhausted the following day. Yep, we did it and you will too. We guarantee you'll only do it once. Chalk it up as a learning experience and one to pass along to other moms.

And while cold and flu season is over now, we're positive, something will show up in your house in the future. Remember to stay calm and observe before you leap or sprint to the ER. After all, you probably have another child or two to drag along with you.

*This number was quoted from the nurse.

tips to getting the chores done

By Erin Brazofsky

Do you ever wonder how you’re going to get anything (housekeeping, bills, cooking, personal projects, even a shower, right?) done during the day when you have two (or more) super inquisitive and growing little people running, crawling or singing around your knees? Me too.

In my limited experience, I’ve come to some solutions to help me get things done and not rely on PBS Kids to interact with my kids. Hopefully some of what I’ll share will give you some encouragement that you can get “things” done.

#1. Get your wee ones involved in what you’re doing. It might mean taking a little more time to accomplish something, but where appropriate, let them actively participate in what you’re doing. Whether it be switching the laundry (let them throw the clothes in the dryer for you; I guarantee if you have a boy, he will get a HUGE thrill out of it), dusting (give them a clean rag and let them go to town), or making cookies, they will love being Momma’s special helper.

#2. Structured playtime on their own can be your best friend. Between my 6-month old and my 23-month old, taking a shower can be an Olympic speed sport these days. If I don’t get up and shower before they rise, I will take advantage of Seth’s morning nap and let Levi play in his room with a few select toys.

#3. A “SHOW!” (as Levi calls it) is not always a bad thing. Despite what I said about PBS Kids above, I think letting your kidlets watch a 30-minute program so you can get something done that you can’t let them help with can be a saving grace.

What do the rest of my fellow Bunchers do to get things done? Please share your thoughts; I would love to have some other tips!

traveling with your bunch: the epic journey

By Rachel Ostlie

My family recently returned from what we deemed our “Tour de Latinoamerica,” a marathon vacation to four cities in three countries, involving a total of ten flights. Both my husband and I grew up in South America, and our parents still live there (though in different places than where spent our childhood) so we wanted to visit all the places and people dear to us. Plus, this was our first chance to show off our adorable blonde bunch!

Long car trips or flights are nothing new to us, but international travel with children was a whole new animal. One unforeseen hassle ended up being our 22-month-old lap “infant,” whom we have never paid a cent for in North America, was charged anywhere from 10-25% of the full fare on most international carriers. What really made it an issue (apart from forking out more money) was the fact that we purchased our tickets online, and when we found out about various airline's policies, it was impossible to purchase an infant “ticket” without purchasing an adult fare simultaneously. This meant my husband had to figure out the status of our youngest at each check-in, while I desperately threw fruit strips, stickers, and lollipops at the kids to keep them happy during the wait.

You can view the above as Baby Bunching Epic Travel Tip #1) Know the airline's rules about infant travel.Here is some more knowledge gleaned from our month of travel, and I'd love to hear any more that those with multi-stamped passports have to add!

2) Be flexible – Of course this tip is a given, but it is SO TRUE. Flexibility when you are not in your own home, let alone your own country, is a must. Prior to this trip, I was concerned what all our “schedule-is-out-the-window” and “take-life-as-it-comes” would do to our toddlers, but I was pleasantly surprised. They were willing to take it all in stride, and our type-A firstborn had only one meltdown related to lack of schedule the entire trip.

3) Bring stability along – Temper the need to be flexible with the opportunities your family has for stability while traveling. Make sure to bring the kids' favorite toys and books, or even a picture of a beloved playmate. Try to establish some routines, even if you can't keep your normal ones. We started a daily habit every night before they went to bed: reading a Bible story to the kids, letting them color a related coloring page, giving them a sticker and a gummy vitamin, and singing the same songs, then brushing their teeth. Maybe for your bunch having the same thing for breakfast every morning would be nice, or keeping a strict naptime. No matter what, small points of stability can be found anywhere you go.

4) Be educational – Though the kids might not be going to their mommy-and-me classes, or may be skipping school days altogether, there is no reason not be educational on the trip. Take advantage of the new places and things you'll see. Our kids learned about sea lions and seaweed, farm animals and produce, and most of all, about airplanes. I printed out a few coloring sheets for each country we visited with the map, flag, and national flower or bird; older children might enjoy fact lists or worksheets. Of course everyone enjoys a good book to help them connect what they are learning to what they already know. Growing up in a big city where about thirteen stars are visible each night (per the Chicago Planetarium), an evening of stargazing in a remote desert was a huge deal for our three-year-old. It helped that we had read How Big Is A Million? by Anna Milbourne the weeks before, so she was excited to see a million stars.

5) Mooch off friends and family – The independent American in us is usually quite averse to anything that resembles charity, but if you have friends or family available on your trip, feel free to mooch off of them. Staying in a home is infinitely cheaper than staying in a hotel, and you might even gain some cultural experience for yourself and the kids. Having a family member show you the local spots could teach you a lot more than the Lonely Planet guidebook. Of course, relationships can bring hassle, and it's up to you to decide what living circumstance would be best for your family. But we found that for our family, the benefits outweighed the trouble.

6) Do your homework – If you are a do-it-yourselfer, or a travel nerd, then you might want to disregard the suggestion in number five. The last big trip my husband and I took was our “babymoon” to Morocco and Spain. We had friends in Morocco, but in Spain we were on our own. We brought along Lonely Planet guidebooks for both countries, asked a lot of advice from those who had traveled there before, and meticulously planned our trip. At the end of our four weeks in South America, I realized that I had missed a little bit of that independence, and a lot of the learning experience and socio-historical background. Next trip I'll remember to do my homework ahead of time.

Stay tuned for the next post, where we'll cover packing, bribes, and risks...
 
Rachel is a happily baby bunching mom of two, with another baby on the way. She has been either pregnant or breastfeeding for the entire past four years (minus one month).

baby bunching Q/A: potty training toddler w/ baby

Q: Can you give me advice on potty training my very ready 22 month old girl while, juggling my five month old? We tried and she likes it, but the baby is always needing something when she wants to go, or she wants to sit forever and the baby starts to cry. Help!

A: This is one of the first of many Baby Bunching lessons you will have to master. Everyone always suddently needs something when you're dealing with the other. Always. Our kids, collectively, have gone through many 'windows' of being potty ready, and I think you have to take one of those and go with it. So if it's 22 months and you want to brave it, we applaud you! My kids never showed the typical signs like being dry all night long. But there was a point when they were dry for long periods of time. But generally I knew they were ready when they started talking about it more and more.

But if you do the math, most of us are doing the potty training when our oldest kids are 2 ½ to 3 years old. Where does that put your little one? Crawling and/or walking around in the lovely he’s-into-everything-phase. So while you’re trying to cajole one to pee pee on the potty, the other one is probably emptying the trash, taking the TP off the roll or in the kitchen eating from something in the pantry.

You can’t be in two places at once at any point in this process. So whether it's now when your baby is 5 months old, it will be equally (if not more) difficult when baby is 14 months old.

When I potty trained my son, he was just about two-and-a-half. My daughter was 15 months and hated to be left alone for longer than half a second. I was trying to spend all my time in the bathroom with him and she was crying because I couldn’t spend the time with her. If he hadn’t been ready for the potty, I probably would have just waited 6 months, and trained them both at the same time. Although I imagine that’s not easy either.

Here are some general thoughts to consider before/during potty training your first born:

Be realistic. If you’ve just had a new baby and your toddler show signs of wanting to use the potty, know that this probably is not the best time to tackle this. I tried this with Alex at 18 months. (Anna was 2 months old) Yeah, it didn’t work. I missed that window of opportunity. [Hint to you who haven’t gone this route: There will be another one.] Each of my kids had about 3-4 ‘windows’ where they showed interest in it. As a new mom, the first time we hit one, I went out and bought the potty and tried to go forth. Little did I know potty training is about both child AND mom being ready. Do it when you’re in the right mental state to do it. Cuz it ain't easy. They don’t call it training for nothing!

Do it fast. Don’t drag out the training process. It’s better to dedicate a weekend or a weekend plus a few days to just doing this and being done. You have another little one who needs you too. If it’s not working after a few days. Back off and try again another time.

This will change up your outing routine. Nothing says nightmarish fun like having a great time on the playground with your kids, and your oldest--who you’re potty training--decides he has to pee RIGHT NOW! That means you have to go right now, too. Even if you just spread out lunch on the blanket. Even if you just sat down at McDonalds to eat. You have to go right now. I have fond memories of us loading our Happy Meal into the stroller so Alex could pee….Anna still chowing down on the hamburger in the bathroom. Gross, huh? (See, at 5 months, your baby is still happy to just hang out!)

The good news is your little one is little and doesn’t mind a sprint or change of venue to dash to the bathroom. The tables will be turned—in probably a year or so—when you’re doing this dash for your younger one. Your older child will be the disappointed one at that point.

Potty Training is a full-time job. Potty training is an all-day affair. Call in reinforcements when you do it. Have your spouse around to take the younger child off your hands or to give you a break from cleaning up pee. Grandma? Great. Have her come in and befriend the wee one. No one should do it alone.

The bottom line is everyone in the house needs to be in this together. And once you decide it’s the right time, just go for it. Rip it off like a Bandaid. It will go much faster and in the end a weekend of madness is worth it if you’re done.