Mom Blog and Baby Blog | Baby Bunching

reflections on reflux

Disclaimer: Please remember that we at Baby Bunching do not have medical degrees and we would never, ever suggest that you take our medical advice (especially that involving medication for your child) without the knowledge and support of your pediatrician.  So read the following advice...and then consult your doctor.

Recently, I had a park play date with a Baby Bunching friend whose youngest child (at 5 months old and CUTE as a button!) broke my heart because I think he may be struggling with reflux (gastroesophogal reflux disease, or GERD, in the medical world).  

I say *may* because I feel as though reflux is the mystery ailment of the baby world.  Linda is convinced that EVERY baby has reflux. This is a theory I would support, but for the fact that my eldest child was literally the happiest baby on the block.  After three children (and half a dozen pediatricians along the way), I'm convinced that even pediatricians don't know definitively.  If it looks like reflux and smells like reflux, they'll encourage you to give the reflux meds a try and see if it IS reflux.

My third baby was "diagnosed" with reflux after a particularly high-stress trip to urgent care over Labor Day weekend when he was a little over a month old.  My husband, who had had just about enough of the constant crying, laid down the law and insisted that there MUST be something wrong with the kid and it was inhumane to "wait and see" until regular doctor's hours on Monday morning.  With little reflux diagnostic technology on hand in urgent care on a Saturday night, the pediatrician on call suggested that we give the medicine a try.  I resisted the idea of medication at first, being the type of person that will walk around for 4 days with a  headache before taking an Advil, and I certainly didn't like the idea of a daily dose of anything for my newborn.  But the doctor insisted that the medication was so safe that it was used on preemies and that we should just give it a try and see if it worked.  

It worked.  Just a few hours later, we had an entirely different baby on our hands, and silence that was music to our ears - for the first time in a month.  

Although my mother had previously suggested the possibility of reflux, I poo-pooed the suggestion because the symptoms didn't "match."  Although the baby was fussy, he wasn't projectile vomiting (and in fact, barely spit up), slept in decent stretches, and was appropriately gaining weight.  He nursed ok (although not great, and did better from a bottle once I introduced it around the 3-week mark).  He was just fussy and fidgety every waking hour. It turns out that reflux has a stealth mode - otherwise known as "Silent Reflux" - that doesn't involve any projectile vomiting, but hurts just as much.  And while most babies grow out of it around the 6 to 9-month mark, it makes for a VERY long 6 to 9 months if not diagnosed and treated.  In addition to medication, we were under strict instructions to feed the baby sitting up (as opposed to reclining), leave him sitting up for 30 minutes after each feeding, and put his mattress at an incline.  As you can imagine, these instructions make for some tricky nursing acrobatics, but we made it work (although now I can barely remember how, in all honesty).

In retrospect, I believe that my Baby #2 had undiagnosed reflux.  To this day, I'm overwhelmed with guilt at the notion that not only was he in pain for months, but I let it mess up nursing.  After going dairy-free myself, and then finally moving through soy and the full range of "sensitive tummy" formulas, we finalIy settled on the uber-expensive Alimentum because it was the only thing his little tummy could tolerate.  With him (and his 18-month old older brother in tow), I was in a Baby Bunching haze, quite honestly.  He could've projectile vomited in my face 10 times a day and it probably wouldn't have raised a red flag.   When I stumbled upon a solution that "worked," I didn't question it - I just went with it. For these reasons, I am on a one-woman mission to save all of my mommy friends and their precious darlings from the hell that is reflux. If your baby fusses all the time or never seems "settled,"  consider this friendly advice to ask your doctor (or an objective friend, or a grandma) about the possibility of reflux.  

You can absolutely try going dairy-free, eliminating other gassy foods from your diet and sampling a variety of formulas, but it can take weeks for dairy to work its way out of your system and in the meantime your baby is fussing his way through the "wait and see" approach.  I will admit that I am normally a big proponent of "wait and see" parenting, believing that kids progress differently at different developmental stages and in their own time, and also that some conditions clear up on their own if left alone.  However, this is one situation where if your pediatrician agrees that your baby may be a candidate for reflux medication, it's worth taking a shot at seeing if it works - for your own sanity and the baby's!

baby bunching Q/A: getting pregnant while breastfeeding

We received this question from Julie. It's one that we thought we'd throw it out there for our readers since neither of us were trying to get pregnant while breastfeeding.

Q: I have a 2 1/2 year old and a 7 month old (2 years and 8 days apart).  My husband finally agreed to a third, but would prefer sooner rather than later. How do you plan to be a Baby Buncher if you're still nursing?   I've reached the point where I'm ok with being pregnant again.  But I'm still nursing, and my monthly visitor hasn't returned yet.  I know it happens to lots of people who don't plan it this way, but is there something I can do?

A: Since Cara was still nursing when she got pregnant (accidentally), and Linda had already stopped nursing when she did, we're going to ask our readers to chime in. But first we did a bit of asking around from some breastfeeding experts.

Our Baby Bunching friend Andi of Mama Knows Breast reminded us that it is still possible to get pregnant while nursing, that is how she found herself with Baby #2. While exclusive breastfeeding is a great method of birth control, it's not 100% if certain things don't apply. She referenced Kellymom.com who says "exclusive breastfeeding (by itself) is 98-99.5% effective in preventing pregnancy if 1) your baby is less than 6 months old 2) your period hasn't returned 3) baby is breastfeeding on cue (both day & night), and gets nothing but breast milk or only token amounts of other foods."

Sounds like to us if you're not totally breastfeeding (meaning your babe is getting solids, too) your chances of getting pregnant while nursing do go up. It also may mean just tinking with when/how often you nurse. Check out Kellymom.com's page on breastfeeding and fertility as it might give you some tips on what to do. Good luck!

ready, set, wean!

The American Academy of Pediatric's official stance on breastfeeding advocates "Exclusive breastfeeding for approximately the first six months and support for breastfeeding for the first year and beyond as long as mutually desired by mother and child."   Which sounds awesome in theory.  In practice, I frequently wonder exactly how many of the Academy's voting members on this policy were actually breastfeeding moms.

Don't get me wrong - I am completely pro-breast feeding.  If it is working for mom and baby.  It never ceases to amaze me how breastfeeding can simultaneously be one of the most natural things in the world and one of the most difficult. This is particularly true for Baby Bunchers, many of whom find themselves either pregnant or nursing (or both!) for a minimum of three consecutive years of their lives, frequently more.

I have long held the year-long breastfeeding goal as a standard I hoped to reach someday.  I nursed my oldest pretty much exclusively for nine months and then he kind of weaned himself.  Never much of a cuddler, he just really didn't seem to want to draw sustenance from me anymore.   He was a busy, busy boy and didn't want to be pinned down to eat.   I will confess that, as a first-time mom, I did worry that if I pushed through the apparent urge to self-wean that I would somehow force him to revert and get overly attached and  find it so hard to break the "habit" that I would be nursing a fifth grader.   Figuring that we only had three more months until I could move him over to cow's milk and I might as well dip into those free formula samples from the hospital, I just kind of let it go. Good thing, too, because a month later I would find out I was already two months pregnant with his brother.  Who says breastfeeding is birth control?

Baby Number Two had issues.  Looking back, I think he may have had undiagnosed reflux, but I'll just say that in conjunction with his physical issues and his older brother's refusal to sit still for more than five minutes, feeding was a nightmare with him from day one.  I started supplementing at around three weeks, beat myself up daily for my inability to make nursing work, and finally signed off (with much regret) around four months.  And I regret giving up so soon to this day.

Enter Baby Number Three and I am hell bent on nursing to the one-year mark.  I have been supplementing a little since the beginning once my supply was established (darn, that formula is a slippery slope once you start it).  But we've pushed through all the hurdles and continued nursing and now he gets maybe one 8 oz bottle a day, and not even every day.  We're now trekking along at almost nine months, on target to make the one year mark. 

But this week he started moving - alot.  So much that nursing has become a physical battle.  He now attacks the breast like a ferocious dog, sucks furiously to achieve letdown, and then can't be bothered to stick around for the payoff.  Nope - he's practically crawling out of the room with my breast clamped in his mouth.  When I am able to convince him to sit still long enough to eat, he's either poking my eyes out, clawing at my hair, or shoving his fingers in my mouth.  Or sometimes, instead of draining the breast like he did as an infant, he sips at it.  Luxuriously, at his convenience - when there is nothing more interesting going on in the room.  Somehow he didn't get the memo that breastfeeding is neither a Iron Man triathlon water station nor a tea party.

Once again, my little one's apparent lack of attachment to (or even interest in) nursing is weakening my resolve and threatening to keep me from the one-year mark.   But I'm determined to push through it this time.  Baby Number Three is the final chapter and this is my last chance to show the AAP once and for all that I can run with the big dogs. 

regrets, anyone?

I've had very few regrets about Baby Bunching.  I hadn't really planned to be a Baby Buncher and it was a LOT of hard work, but given a do-over, I would most certainly do it again.  And hopefully better the second time around.  That's not to say that I'm falling all over myself to Bunch #3 and #4, though (in fact, I'm pretty sure there won't be a #4)...

The two main drawbacks to Baby Bunching for me were:  A) it kicked my ass and I was dead tired for two straight years and B) it really does not allow as much time for me to devote individually to each child as I would like.  But as I see it, A is a moot point because really, who ever said parenting was easy, no matter how you do it?  And B is kind of a moot point too, because I may not have as much time with my kids as I'd like, but they have as much time with each other as they want.  They'd rather be with each other than me, anyway.

But the other day, I decided that my true Baby Bunching regret is that I didn't nurse my second baby as long as I would've liked.  With my first, breastfeeding was a breeze.  I had ample supply and ample time to nurse to build my supply.  Since I didn't go back to work full-time, I skipped the expensive electric pump and just got a handheld, which suited my purposes just fine and I loved it.

The second time around, I had a very fussy baby with tummy problems and a very demanding toddler that wouldn't let me sit still long enough to nurse.  I killed myself for four months trying to make it work and in the end, just gave up.

#3 is now also a pretty fussy baby.  The difference is that #1 and 2 are old enough to keep each other occupied (or watch a video) while I nurse.  I had my share of troubles with #3 in the beginning, but a nice electric pump got us over the hump and now, at 7 months, it's been smooth sailing ever since.

All that to say, I felt a sense of failure all along for not making nursing work with my second, so I was absolutely committed to making it work with the third.  I think I felt guilty because I was in such an addled frame of mind with the second baby that I didn't have the energy to pull out all the stops before I quit - the electric pump, the herbal supplements, stuffing myself full of oatmeal, milk-stimulating medication, etc.  I just didn't have it in me to problem solve or pursue options to make nursing work.  And on some level, I truly think that if my babies hadn't been bunched, I would've had more energy to make it work.

I will say that at 3 1/2 years old, my second is every bit as healthy and smart (maybe a little more so, but don't tell the others) as his brothers.  So no adverse effects to the abbreviated stint with nursing that I can see.  It's time to check this particular Mommy Guilt at the door, but I can't seem to shake it.

So there you have it - my biggest Baby Bunching regret.  Care to share yours?

review + giveaway: clip n' feed nursing cover

Those who know me, know I really struggled with breastfeeding my first child. When my second came around, I was determined to make it work. And we did--for five months. Until breastfeeding in quiet and total darkness got to be too difficult for everyone.

I must admit to never using a nursing cover with either kid. I grabbed the biggest and most breathable blanket to take with me. But I watched a friend using this Clip N' Feed cover a few months ago. It took a very clever mommy to come up with this concept. 

What I like about this cover: It has clips, and ones that can be removed to use in different locations on the cover. I also like that it's big so serves multiple purposes. Not only can it be used to make breastfeeding more discreet and comfortable for mom, but it can clip to the stroller, the car seat or even the cart to keep the sun out of baby's face.  And I love that it also comes in blankety material, which means it can double as an instant floor mat or burp cloth (preferably not at the same time...but you never know.) I also love that these come in a beautiful assortment of colors and they are all made here in the US. Yay!

What I'm still not sold on: Why are these needed? I think blankets do a good job doing the same thing. Babies, generally, are not thrilled with eating under a cloth anyway, but I guess you can't stay home all the time and if this makes you feel better about it, I like this one. I don't know if I would run right out and buy this for myself; however, I would purchase this as a gift for a new mom....especially a new Baby Bunching mom.

I do have two to giveaway--one in the butterfly pattern and one classic blue blanket.

Just leave a comment here by Jan. 26 with your best nursing-in-public story--where you did it, what people said, how you felt, or just how you let it all hang out. Please let us know if you use a cover like this and what you think about them. We'll randomly select two winners.

baby bunching battles: breastfeeding

I am the first to support a breastfeeding friend.  I will join her in scorning the hospital nursery's (or well-intentioned grandmother or babysitter's) attempts to fill up a baby with formula.  I will sit next to her while she nurses in public and deflect irritated glares, defending her right to nurse anywhere, anytime.  I will champion her right to take time out of the work day and pump.  When she is experiencing supply problems, I will applaud her efforts to pump and mix whatever breastmilk she is able to pump with formula, since some is better than none.       

I will also be the first to support a friend who needs to end a toxic breastfeeding relationship.  I've listened to many a friend sob over supply issues, latch issues, suck issues, time issues, and more.  I've told them time and time again that breastfeeding is only "best for baby" if it's working for both baby AND mom.  And moms have a tendency to try to hang on to it a lot harder than babies do.

I definitely consider myself pro-breastfeeding, but not at the expense of mom's (and the household's) sanity.

So why is it that I can't follow my own advice?

Many Baby Bunchers agree that breastfeeding, even if it went smoothly the first time around, is one of their biggest battles when it comes to the second babe in the bunch.  For me personally, it was a breeze the first time around, including the weaning process.  The second time was a nightmare.  But my kids were 17 months apart and my oldest, while a textbook baby, was NOT an easy toddler.  But when it came time to breastfeed my third (and non-bunched) baby, I was determined to make it work, thinking I was just a victim of circumstances the second time around.

Yet, here I am again.  This baby has reflux, which adds a whole 'nother dimension to feedings.  I am in the vicious feed/pump/supplement cycle where you're never really sure how much baby has had to eat or if he is full.  And, of course, feeding issues lead to sleeping issues.  And sleeping issues lead back to feeding issues.  And in between, it's just a whole mess of crying and screaming from both baby and mama.  Oh yeah, and did I mention that I have two other kids off to the side that are subsisting on the Fruit Loops and milk they can make themselves while I spend an ENTIRE day trying to get ONE good feeding into their baby brother?

Clearly, the sanity of the mother and the household are at stake here.  So why am I hanging on to this?

setting up for breastfeeding success

By Dr. Jenny Pehl, Ph.D.

[Editor's note: This is the first guest blog post from our wonderful group of Baby Bunching moms. If you would like to guest post, please send us an email at babybunching at gmail dot com.]

When my oldest was about 3 or 4 weeks old, I did the math and realized that between his lazy suck and insatiable appetite, I was spending 8 hours a day breastfeeding.  Even if your baby is a model of efficiency, breastfeeding still requires a time commitment at least equivalent to a part-time job.  And, like any job, it's worth putting some thought into your work environment.

Whether it's your first or seventh breastfed baby, some items are crucial for your space.  The first thing you'll need is the most comfortable seat in the house.  You'll also need some kind of a footstool, a pillow to help with positioning (I love the My Brest Friend), and a cloth to deal with those "wet burps".  For additional comfort, you'll need a spot within reach for a bottle of water, maybe a healthy snack, a good book, and the stereo remote.  I don't recommend trying to watch TV or play video games while nursing (though I did beat FFXII with my oldest), because there's too much temptation to continue the feeding "just to the end of this show/level" long after the baby has stopped eating.  And don't you have something better to do? Hmm?

But baby bunching moms quickly learn that EVERYTHING becomes just a little more difficult with a toddler involved. When Big Brother/Sister is still mostly a baby, you can't just cocoon yourself away with the newborn, especially once Daddy goes back to work and Grandma flies home to Grandpa. In order to successfully breastfeed, you're going to have to include your toddler. 

Step 1: Self-Directed Play.  While you're pregnant, encourage your toddler to play independently for a little while each day.  Sit in one place and let him or her bring you things to play with if they wish.  Let your child lead and let them ignore you if they're distracted by the game they've made up themselves.  This also gives your pregnant-self a chance to relax and put up those swollen feet. 

Step 2: A Safe Place.  Make your husband drag that comfy chair to the most babyproofed room of your house.  It will not take long for the average 1-year-old to discover that when Mama's nursing the baby, she's not going to be jumping up in a hurry to put a stop to some fun baby adventures.  You're not going to be able to relax enough for a good let-down if you're worried about what your toddler is up to and yelling "No!" every few minutes.  There also needs to be plenty of fun things around to play with.

Step 3: Both/And Not Either/Or.  All the toys made in China are not going to keep your toddler distracted from you forever. Have a spot next to you that your toddler can crawl up on when he or she needs some Mama-love. My son crawls up onto an endtable next to my rocker. From there, he often likes to sit on the arm of the chair and we all rock together. If your toddler feels that he or she can get your attention and affection whenever they want, they are much less likely to resent the baby's nursing. (That is, if you're not tandem nursing.)

Breastfeeding CAN be very rewarding with your baby bunch.  Given the freedom to do his own thing, my son will often come and look at the baby and adorably pet her fuzzy head. Once the baby's in a blissed-out food coma, you'll be rested enough to get down on the floor and wrestle with that toddler.  Nature designed breastfeeding to be good for moms as well as babies; after all, that may be your only chance to sit down all day!

Dr. Jenny has a 19-month-old son and a 4-month-old daughter. They are 14 1/2 months apart.

breastfeeding q & a with about.com lactation consultant

A couple of weeks ago, I had the opportunity to meet Melissa Nagin, a NY-based Lactation Consultant and About.com’s breastfeeding expert.  In an effort to get more information on breastfeeding for Baby Bunchers, I asked her the following questions:

Baby Bunching: Do you have any tips for moms who have children close together – specifically, how to carve out time for nursing an infant when you have a toddler running circles around you? 

Melissa: There are actually many different ways to deal with taking time to nurse when you have an active toddler. As unrealistic as it may sound now, finding quiet-time activities for the toddler is a great place to start. Before your baby is even born, purchase a whole new stash of coloring books, fresh crayons, stickers, puzzles...anything that seems fresh and new will be much more exciting to your toddler and will most likely hold their attention better than something they've seen a thousand times. Also, I have never been opposed to turning on Sesame Street to ensure that I can get something done, so if a mom has a newborn and a toddler and really needs some time to relax, there's nothing wrong with turning on a little PBS!

Baby Bunching: Are there any must-have products that you know of that making nursing easier?  Nature provides the boobs, but what accessories can you recommend?

Melissa: With all of the products on the market, it can get very overwhelming to figure out what to buy. To start, you'll need a supportive pillow so that the baby is right at breast height for nursings and if you're modest about nursing in public, you may want to purchase a cover-up – there are quite few available on the market.  But the best product that I recommend for any nursing mom, is a breast pump -- my favorite is the Playtex Embrace (if you're going back to work or will pump frequently) or the Petite (for more occasional use)--so you can really feel like you're taking a break, yet still providing your breast milk.  Breast pumps do not have to be an expensive purchase. The Playtex products that I mentioned are under $200 and the one of the most comfortable, efficient pumps out there. 

Baby Bunching: Give us the lowdown on whether what mom eats really matters for baby.  I've had everyone from lactation consultants to OB/GYNs to pediatricians give me different answer on whether or not mom's diet really even affects baby's gassiness or digestive issues. What's the real deal

Melissa: I always tell my moms to eat anything and everything that they want, in moderation, of course! 

There are really only two reasons why a breastfed baby should have excessive gassiness...One, mom isn't keeping him/her on one breast for long enough to get to the hindmilk. The foremilk is very high in lactose, so if she switches too soon, the baby is going to get a lot of lactose which can contribute to crampiness/gassiness.  However, if the baby stays on the same breast for an entire feed, he's going to get the perfect balance of foremilk and hindmilk and the lactose and the fat together will be much more comfortable in that tiny tummy. Two, cow's milk...some babies have a sensitivity to the protein in cow's milk, so if mom has a diet replete with this kind of dairy, and the baby is susceptible, mom is going to end up with a very uncomfortable and gassy baby. If you suspect that this might be the case – please note that it takes a good 10 days or so to clear out of both mom and baby's systems, so don't be surprised if you go cold turkey and don't see a change for a good week or so. So, all of the wives' tales about broccoli, onions, garlic, spicy foods can be dismissed -- Eat well!  Don't eat food with no taste!!

Baby Bunching: Many Baby Bunchers are still nursing when they get pregnant.  How do you forge through the fatigue and nausea of the first trimester and continue breastfeeding?  Are there any special considerations or tips you'd like to share? 

Melissa: A lot depends on your child's breastfeeding patterns. If he/she is willing, nurse in bed and have him take a nap with you.  If you're nauseous and vomiting, the most important thing is to stay as hydrated as possible.  You're still trying to maintain a milk supply, sustain a pregnancy, and feel alive, so dehydration is something we really want to avoid.  I always recommend stocking up on a lot of crystallized ginger, ginger tea, even ginger ale.  Sea Bands are also great for keeping nausea at bay.  It may be tough for the first trimester, but it will get better and you can still maintain a breastfeeding relationship for as long as you want, although your milk will change again around the 5th month of pregnancy, so you may notice changes in your child's nursing behavior.

Baby Bunching: What about tandem nursing?  Do you recommend it?  What are your suggestions for making it work? 

Melissa: Tandem nursing is a wonderful way to continue your nursing relationship with your older child while starting anew with your baby. If a mom is interested in it, power to her! I recommend doing whatever mom wants to do. Sometimes the older child is only nursing in the morning and at night before the baby arrives, but then regresses and wants to feed every time the baby does...This is very normal and mom should just go with it. As soon as the older child realizes that baby is here to stay and settles into a routine again, she'll probably go back to her old habits.

[Author's note: And, given that I am now breastfeeding a baby with reflux.  I asked her one last self-interested question - maybe some of you are interested...]

Baby Bunching: Can you provide tips for breastfeeding a baby with reflux?

Melissa: Babies with reflux should be checked by their pediatrician, but some little techniques that can help ease the discomfort are nursing in a more upright position and hand-expressing before a feeding, if mom is very full.  Hand-expressing can help because sometimes the foremilk combined with a strong let-down can really disturb a baby with reflux, so taking away a lot of the foremilk can help that.

feeling the pain

One of the occupational hazards of Baby Bunching is physical pain. We're not talking about the kind that comes from childbirth and recovery.  We're talking about the kind that comes from carrying a toddler and a baby around at the same time, nursing 23 hours a day with your arms and shoulders held in unnatural positions, constantly darting to rescue toddlers teetering off playground equipment/dashing into the street/running away in the store, etc. - you get the point.  That doesn't even include the pain incurred by lifting all the gear - moving car seats from vehicle to vehicle, hoisting a double stroller in and out of your trunk with one hand while your other holds a kid, and assembling and disassembling the PackNPlay in every location known to man. 

Both my husband and I noticed when we were in the thick of Baby Bunching that it seemed to have aged our bodies considerably.  We would literally fall into bed exhausted at the of every day with aching muscles that we didn't even know we had.  And it continued on that way for about 4 years.  Yes, Baby Bunching is definitely a marathon, not a sprint, so settle in for the long haul.  Fortunately, by the time my youngest reached 2 1/2, everyone was walking well, we were doing considerably less toting around of children, and we noticed that our ibuprofen consumption had dropped by half.

Enter another new baby.  I'm not sure if my husband is feeling the pain this time around, but I sure am.  This one has to be nursed sitting up due to his reflux, which requires a bizarre contortion of my breast and his head, all tacked together by clenching everything in my arms at odd angles.  After he eats, he has to be held upright, preferably on someone's (usually mine) shoulder.  This baby prefers to be held.  All the time.  So I wear him in the Moby wrap while I trek up and down the three floors of my house attending to the needs of the rest of my Bunch.  He can't walk yet so I don't have to chase him, but his big brothers are now high-energy 3 and 4 year olds who have discovered wheels - bikes, skates, scooters, etc.  So keeping up with them has taken on a whole new element.  All in all, Michael Phelp's daily workout has nothing on mine.

On the bright side, I have just about dropped all my baby weight.  Too bad I hung on to a freakishly elongated torso, a doughy tummy, and breasts that are luscious now but will return to their normal paper-thin, mosquito bite sized proportions once I quit nursing. Ugh. 

Speaking of weight loss, an interesting word to the wise for Baby Bunchers.  When I was nursing my second son, my OB warned me that I needed to really watch my weight when I quit nursing him.  She claims that many women lose all their baby weight while breastfeeding and then gain it back when they stop because they continue to eat like they are breastfeeding.  This is especially true for women who have babies back-to-back, since their bodies have less time to recover and they may get pregnant again before they stop nursing.  Which makes sense.  I actually weighed LESS when I got pregnant with my second than my first, because the first was only 7 months old and I was still nursing.  I did notice that some weight crept back on after #2.

interview with 'mama knows breast'

We recently interviewed Andi Silverman, author of Mama Knows Breast: A Beginner's Guide to Breastfeeding. Most of you probably are not breastfeeding beginners, but breastfeeding can be a very different experience with each child, especially when you have a toddler to run after.

Baby Bunching: As a Baby Buncher yourself, what would you say is the biggest challenge when nursing an infant and having a young toddler running around?

Andi: I've never been able to juggle. I simply could never keep two balls in the air at once. But with a baby and a toddler, I definitely became an expert juggler of a different sort.  I learned how to feed a toddler in a high chair while nursing a baby.  I learned how to chase a toddler around the playground with a baby hanging off my boob. And I learned that sometimes, you simply can't satisfy both of them at the same time. Someone will end up crying, and you have to realize that you are doing your best.

Baby Bunching: What are good activities you would recommend for moms to do with young toddlers while they nurse their infants? (I know books may be difficult for an 18-month old for more than about 2 minutes).

Andi: If you sit and nurse your baby on the floor, then it's possible to play with your toddler at the same time.  You can read books; build miles of Thomas The Tank Engine train tracks; and construct elaborate LEGO structures.  When all else fails, there's nothing wrong with turning on the TV for a short stint.

Baby Bunching: We know many moms who struggled the second time with breastfeeding since they have another child to attend to, what you recommend for those struggling?

Andi: If you're running into breastfeeding problems, call a lactation consultant as soon as possible.  Every baby is different, so you might find yourself running into obstacles you didn't have the first time.  There's no reason you should expect to be an expert just because you've already had a baby.  If the main problem is figuring out how to balance the needs of two kids, get help.  Call in the cavalry of family and friends.  And if possible, consider hiring a babysitter. 

Baby Bunching: Many times with a second baby, a mom will have to breastfeed in public since the other child wants to go out. What do you recommend for those who are anxious about breastfeeding in public?

Andi: You will simply have to get over any anxiety you may have about breastfeeding in public. If you want to breastfeed, and you're looking after both kids at the same time, you can't sit home all day. You'll go stir crazy! So put on your brave face and go for it.  With time, breastfeeding in public will be second nature.  There are also a lot of nursing tops and shawls that can make nursing in public easier.

Baby Bunching: Can you tell us about your own personal experience with nursing?

Andi: With our first son, I certainly had a moment when I thought to myself, “I have no idea what I’m doing. I know more about my car seat, stroller and crib than I do about how to feed this baby!”  Fortunately, I got advice from lactation consultants to help me over certain hurdles. I also found some really useful breastfeeding books. But I soon realized that there was space for one more book-- a book that took a slightly different approach to breastfeeding.

So I set out to write the book that I wanted to read—a well-illustrated handbook that gives moms practical information in a light-hearted, frank, and irreverent manner. Mama Knows Breast has everything from basic advice on how to hold your baby, to lifestyle tips on where you can comfortably breastfeed in public. The book also reassures moms that the decision whether or not to breastfeed is a highly personal matter.

Andi Silverman's two sons are 18 months apart. She's a former lawyer and journalist living in New York City.