When my kids were newborns, I clung fervently to the almighty pacifier as a soother - even learning to tuck the bottom half right into their "baby burrito" swaddling at night to encourage it to stay in place. As they grew from sleepy newborns into active infants and the paci kept slipping out and waking them up, I prayed that they would find their thumb/fingers and learn to self-soothe and GO BACK TO SLEEP. As a recovering thumb-sucker myself, I knew even in that moment that it would be far easier to ditch the paci than the thumb as they got older, but I didn't care one whit. All I knew was that life had become one constant stream of babies and I needed a good night's sleep and if it meant I had to saw my first grader's hand off at the wrist someday to cure him of thumb-sucking, so be it.
Fast forward to first (ok, second) grade. I've got two thumb suckers with loveys and a finger sucker without a lovey, and it's abundantly clear that amputation is not an option. Time to pay the piper for my past parenting misdeeds.
With my two thumb suckers, the sucking is tied to the lovey and we've made some half-hearted attempts to hide/dispose of lovey during the day but can't bring ourselves to law down the law at night. My own thumb snuck into my mouth at night long after I'd been fitted with braces to correct damage done earlier by said intruder. So I have every sympathy when my oldest sobs that he "just can't take it" if he can't suck his thumb while he goes to sleep.
Our finger sucker isn't tied to anything - except his fingers. All. day. long. The best we've been able to come up with for him is the pretty much constant admonition to "take your fingers out of your mouth" and "keep your hands busy so they don't creep into your mouth!" To the point where I'm sure he wants to keep his hands busy by beating us with sticks so that we'll shut up and leave him alone.
To make matters worse, our pediatric dentists seem fairly unconcerned about either the thumb or finger sucking, although they both said that if we felt like worrying about it, finger sucking is actually worse in terms of tooth displacement. The fact that my dentists aren't concerned gives me false permission to carry on about my ways, believing that they will eventually "grow out of it". Which I know for a fact is total BS, based on my personal experiences that a well-sucked thumb is tough as leather and even a mouth full of metal is no match for a thumb determined to find it's way home.
Part of me knows I need to lay down the law, and the other part of me, quite honestly, doesn't want my babies to grow up. I can remember when their threadbare loveys were pristine new baby gifts and I was able to snuggle both lovey and baby right up to my chest. Now, the sheer stench of my oldest son's feet keeps me from wanting to snuggle him, even if he could still fit on my lap. And The Caboose has officially reached the age where I try to pull him into my lap and he squirms to break free instead of snuggling in. With the exception of the Pull-Ups on The Caboose, the thumb/finger sucking is the last vestige of "baby" in this house.
Since we've obviously missed the window on the whole "they'll lose interest as they get older and quit on their own" time-line for my two bigger boys, we're gonna go the orthodontic route. Biggest boy will be heading in for a spacer, which, the dentist says, will make it so difficult to suck his thumb that he'll probably quit. My guess is that in another year, Middle will be sent for one as well. Meanwhile, I'm hoping I can salvage The (just turned three year old) Caboose and cure him using natural methods. Does anyone out there have tips for quitting thumb-sucking that worked for you? Because I suck at this.
BF just quit finger sucking this year--he'll be 26 in October. Trust me. Head it off NOW. His parents tried getting rid of the lovey, using bitter apple, gloves, EVERYTHING. I told him he was going to have to give it up on his own or I was going to call his parents and post it on FB. That got his attention.
Good luck to you :/
Posted by: Liz @M2M | Sep 22, 2011 at 05:30 PM
my 6yo daughter just quit over the summer. we just admonished her every time she was caught sucking her thumb and i think that combined with kids teasing her on the school bus is what did the trick. my middle two never sucked their thumbs and i took pacis away around 9 months to prevent them from clinging to them. now my fourth is 3 months old and just "found his thumb." i'm hopeful that it won't be as tough for him to stop, but i'm not holding my breath! good luck!!
Posted by: Joelle | Sep 22, 2011 at 05:54 PM
I sucked my finger until I was...way too old and embarrassing to admit! Nothing my parents did was going to make me stop. I finally stopped when I realized I was too old and decided on my own to stop. My middle son is a finger sucker. I had read a lot about it and most of what I read said that if you don't make an issue of it most kids will stop on their own around 4yrs old. We're going that route (he'll be 4 in 3 months) and I'm really hoping it works!! We have never said a word to him about his finger sucking and he has been doing it less often the past 6 months. I realize that this is probably advice that is not applicable to your situation. But I just remember being mad at my parents for making a big deal about my finger sucking and thinking that I wasn't going to ever stop just to show them!
Posted by: Lori | Sep 22, 2011 at 06:42 PM
I don't have thumb-suckers, but I do have a nose-picker. No matter what we say or do, my 3-year-old picks his nose and will do so til it bleeds. I'm guessing there are similar strategies for nose-picking?
Posted by: Alisha | Sep 25, 2011 at 10:06 PM
I have an almost 3 year old thumb sucker so I will be going through this soon. My best friend put socks on the hands of her almost 6 year old (after talking with him and him agreeing - he wasn't ready a few months before but then came to her and said he was ready) at night. She also mentioned using gloves with all the fingers cut out except the one they suck. Maybe have them trade the lovey for a big special toy? And there is an appliance that pokes them when they try to suck their thumb but that just seems downright mean or from the middle ages or something. Good luck!
Posted by: Jill | Sep 26, 2011 at 11:50 PM
I think these problems can be solved if you keep busy your child in some other activity. This is my personal experience with my kid. I used to take him to dance classes and by diverting his mind the problem was solved.
Posted by: toddler dance classes nj | Sep 27, 2011 at 07:21 AM
These problems are certain with kids.But you don't worry. Keep your kid busy in other tasks.It might help you.
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My 3 year old daughter has been a dedicated, voracious thumb sucker since infancy. When a blister began to form and I explained that when I was her age, mine had to be poked with a pin she switched quite easily to her finger and then slowly back to her thumb. Just a few days ago I put 10 m&ms in a jar. I told her she'd get to eat them all if she kept her thumb out of her mouth. We all helped to reminder he when her thumb was nearing her mouth but if it actually made its way there, she lost 1 m&m. We gave her great praise for trying so hard and reminded her how many were left in the jar. At the end of the day she was thrilled to have 5 left to eat. On day 2 she kept all 10 and today, day 3 she kept all 10 again and had not one reminder. I don't know if the m&ms were the trick or if she just became determined but I do think she may be through with the thumb.
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Posted by: Shelly Hammerson | Jan 10, 2012 at 09:00 AM
I must agree that thumb sucking is really soothing and eases boredom but this should not be tolerated when they are already kids since it will impair their teeth.
Posted by: Orthodontist in Fort Collins | Jan 17, 2012 at 11:48 PM
You have great share and being so strict and rude is not a good option to deal with your child. Offering them other option and distracting them from thumb sucking is best way to get your baby to stop sucking thumb.
Posted by: Geox | Jan 23, 2012 at 12:56 AM
We are curing our 3 almost 4 of thumb sucking. We did band aids on his thumbs. He got a treat for not sucking his thumb over the band aids and a treat for keeping said band aids on. So far it has worked. We are on day 5 of no thumb sucking and it is a lot less painful than I thought.
Posted by: Joanna | Feb 15, 2012 at 10:00 AM
I wouldn't mind toddlers extending a year or two on thumb sucking. A full grown adult who's into it would definitely be ten-folds more painful to watch.
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Posted by: cheap jordans | May 15, 2012 at 08:49 AM
The odd thing here is that those dentists know how much thumb sucking can impair teeth, yet are almost completely unconcerned. Personally, I wouldn't tolerate it, especially once the teeth start growing.
Posted by: Dentist Glen Iris | May 29, 2012 at 10:15 PM