baby bunching Q/A: getting out of the house with baby + toddler

Q: Any advice on how to get out of the house successfully with a 14 month old and newborn?

A: Planning. Planning. Planning. Getting out of the house with your kids is a learned skill. Some days you will get it totally right. Some days you will need to give up and go home. But most days will be a combo of the two. Planning your trip will be the best way to get you out and back in one piece without any tears. 

We are reposting some of our tips because we all need to be reminded, especially me on the food issue as I pushed my Bunch (7 and almost 6) too far last week on no food and had to pay the piper in the end with two crying kids. Always come prepared. 

Definition of a Successful Outing: An excursion outside the realm of one’s abode—whether a walk down the street or a trip across town on the subway—where no child is in tears, hurt, hungry, left behind or locked in car; where mom is not in tears, hurt or needing a drink; where at least one of the outing’s goals is “accomplished;” and at least two of members of the family come home smiling. 

This may seem like a tall order to fill. Or you may be thinking that you don’t know what the hell is wrong with our disorganized asses, but all of YOUR outings will be successful.  Either way, we promise that you need the advice we are about to provide.

The three most important skills for planning and executing successful outings are: 

1) Developing your plan. A few questions to consider:
•     Transportation.  Are you walking, driving, or taking public transportation?  This will determine what kind of stroller you should take. With kids this young, you need something to carry everyone in--sling, carrier, stroller. Always.
•     Ease of navigation.  Will it be crowded?  Will there be ramps for your stroller?  Will you have to walk a long distance across a busy parking lot?  Again, all factors that determine what kind of “wheels”, slings, or baby carriers you should bring.
•     Proximity to food.  Can you buy age-appropriate (bonus points for nutritious) food for all parties if someone starts to break down or do you need to bring your own?  And never, EVER assume that you will be able to complete an outing without food.  Always, always, always have a healthy, yummy snack for all children on hand – you never know when you will have to buy time with a handful of animal crackers (yeah, yeah – we all said we never do it – get over it.)  If your outing will encompass a meal time, be sure you have plenty of food on hand, plus one extra snack beyond what you think you will need.  Don’t forget sippy cups/bottles for all! Did we mention lots of snacks?
•     Quality of destination’s baby-proofedness.  Whether you are going over to a childless friend’s house for dinner or to the mall, think realistically about what you will need to keep your little ones not only entertained, but safe.  We recommend always having some way to either strap all parties into a chair/seat of some sort or wear them on your body, in case you get desperate.

2) Having a Backup Plan. Now that you’ve packed your 63-piece luggage set with everything you need to make a “quick” trip to the drugstore, be sure you have a backup plan.  What will you do if you get there and it’s too crowded and your kids wig out or you can’t keep track of them?  Or if somebody woke up too early that morning and are so tired by the middle of the outing that they are acting like hellacious beasts?  You gotta be prepared for all these scenarios because you will encounter one or more of them at some point.  You need to be flexible in case things don’t go according to plan (and they frequently don’t).  This may mean accepting a substitute – product, outing location, whatever.  Or it may mean scoping out the nearest exit.  Which brings us to….

3) Recognizing When to Cut Your Losses. Sometimes it’s just not worth it.  If your kid(s) is so tired/hungry/bored that he is a fussy nightmare and no one is having any fun or getting anything accomplished, do yourself a favor and go home.  Who cares if you drove across town to treat your kids to the children’s museum – if they’re not having any fun, it’s not worth it anyway.  If you’re at Target and you’re only three items into your list, get only the most critical things you need (i.e. the diapers and the laundry detergent) and come back for the rest another time.  Which reminds us – with any outing, always, always do the most important thing that you came for very first, so that if things go awry and you have to bail, you at least got the most important thing accomplished.

 Enjoy your outing as much as you can. Take pleasure knowing that each time you get it right and each time you get it wrong, you get wiser and more experienced. And try, please try, to do all necessary errands if possible on the weekend when you have extra hands or even get the chance to go alone. This way the weekday trips are just trips to venture out into the world with your Bunch, for fun, shall we say.

 

Comments

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