The phrase didn't have much meaning to me until this year and actually most recently, last week. In today's age when extended family might not be around to help us rear our children, we must be open to letting others help us at least make it through the day. And in turn, be willing to lend a helping hand in return.
When my kids were little, it was all I could do to function during the day. I rarely offered to babysit other's kids and even less asked others to watch my kids. When those around you are barely surviving between potty training, diaper changes, preschool runs or a constant string of sickness, the idea of the "village" stepping in to help you raise your kids seems foreign.
Last Monday afternoon I was sick. It was the kind of sick I knew was not going to go away by morning--aches, chills, fever, cough. Husband was away. Tuesday morning when I woke up I couldn't move. I couldn't even get out of bed until I took a few Advil and waited. After 20 minutes I was able to rise to get my kids cereal. (The upside to kids who are 5 and 6 is that they can entertain themselves for a bit and help themselves from the frig.) An hour later I wasn't any better. After a few phone calls, I had my whole network in place. Neighbor #1 offered to walk my kids to the bus. Neighbor #2 said she'd send her oldest over to walk my dog . Neighbor #3 (who is 9 months pg) offered to drop my daughter at gymnastics, pick up my son at school and then bring everyone home. Neighbor #1 brought dinner over. Neighbor #2 sent boys back over for another dog walk and then called to make sure I was alive.
This morning I woke up and felt like my "village" had saved me from my flu bug. An entire day in bed apparently was what I needed to be able to at least function in some capacity.
If there is any one point to this post, it's this: take the time to build your momtourage, get to know your neighbors, pay it back and pay it forward. We can't forge this road ahead alone. Even if you feel you don't have the energy to watch someone's kid for an afternoon, remember even little things like a pick up/drop off, a meal or just watching someone else's kid on the playground while mom runs to the bathroom is all it takes.
Amen! Great post! So true. What goes around comes around. I have a hard time asking others to watch my kids because I know how hard it is day to day sometimes. But everyone needs some help sometimes.
Posted by: Bekah Ray | Mar 01, 2011 at 06:45 PM
SO true! I have had a husband with an insane work schedule and I recently had emergency surgery - during all of which my sanity was saved by family AND my mom friends, who don't hesitate to jump in and take my kids for a while or bring food over. My friends are there for me and they know that I am here for them. Such a key thing as a mom and even moreso as a buncher.
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