baby bunching Q/A: getting pregnant while breastfeeding

We received this question from Julie. It's one that we thought we'd throw it out there for our readers since neither of us were trying to get pregnant while breastfeeding.

Q: I have a 2 1/2 year old and a 7 month old (2 years and 8 days apart).  My husband finally agreed to a third, but would prefer sooner rather than later. How do you plan to be a Baby Buncher if you're still nursing?   I've reached the point where I'm ok with being pregnant again.  But I'm still nursing, and my monthly visitor hasn't returned yet.  I know it happens to lots of people who don't plan it this way, but is there something I can do?

A: Since Cara was still nursing when she got pregnant (accidentally), and Linda had already stopped nursing when she did, we're going to ask our readers to chime in. But first we did a bit of asking around from some breastfeeding experts.

Our Baby Bunching friend Andi of Mama Knows Breast reminded us that it is still possible to get pregnant while nursing, that is how she found herself with Baby #2. While exclusive breastfeeding is a great method of birth control, it's not 100% if certain things don't apply. She referenced Kellymom.com who says "exclusive breastfeeding (by itself) is 98-99.5% effective in preventing pregnancy if 1) your baby is less than 6 months old 2) your period hasn't returned 3) baby is breastfeeding on cue (both day & night), and gets nothing but breast milk or only token amounts of other foods."

Sounds like to us if you're not totally breastfeeding (meaning your babe is getting solids, too) your chances of getting pregnant while nursing do go up. It also may mean just tinking with when/how often you nurse. Check out Kellymom.com's page on breastfeeding and fertility as it might give you some tips on what to do. Good luck!

Comments

[Buddha Mama]

I wound up pregnant with #2 the same month my first started his big sleeping spells (going 8 hours or more a night). I was still nursing during the day and he was eating some solids, but no formula. At the time my doc said fertility is only suppressed if you're nursing every 4 hours or more, but I don't know if that was true medical information or just her experience saying that. Good luck!

[Miranda]

My first was 10 months when I stopped night nursing, I got one period that month then BAM! Pregnant again. I would say stop night nursing, that is key, but hard I know. My second nursed longer and I didn't get a period till 13 months. Don't forget prenatal vitamins if you are trying.

[Amy]

I got pregnant with my #2 while nursing #1 - #1 was 11 months old at the time and was not ready to wean. I went on to nurse throughout the pregnancy and to tandem nurse for 9 months before weaning #1. Then I nursed #2 until she was 22 months old. My oldest nursed for a total of 28 months.

Just typing that makes me tired. And thirsty.

Yes, it's possible to get pregnant while nursing, and to nurse through pregnancy. On the other hand, I do NOT recommend it.

I felt like a dairy cow. Weaning one but not the other was logistically difficult (in the end, I had to leave town for a week with the baby. I went to St. Thomas for a wedding. There are worse places to run away to). The LLL calls this "weaning by abandonment" which still makes me feel guilty.

If you're going to do this, be prepared to do nothing but nurse constantly all day after the baby comes. Also, being pregnant makes your boobs hurt, which makes nursing excruciating - especially in the middle when your milk dries up but your very persistent nurser is still trying to squeeze blood from the stone (sometimes literally) attached to your chest.

Have an exit strategy - when and how are you going to wean your older child? What if the baby isn't ready yet? How are you going to wean one, but not the other?

Read a LOT about tandem nursing - and not just the LLL propaganda (they really pissed me off with that weaning by abandonment thing, can ya tell?). Read the experiences of real moms who have done it, and what it's been like for them. Blogs are excellent for this.

I went in totally unprepared (I didn't intend to get pregnant when I did), and we survived, but I honestly don't remember a whole lot from my second child's first year, other than being extremely tired and extremely thirsty all the time.

What ended up working best was nursing the baby exclusively on my "good" side, and nursing my toddler exclusively on my "less good" side. That was the only way I could be sure that everyone was getting what she needed.

There were advantages. My kids are exceptionally close, and sometimes I wonder if sharing that early experience isn't part of the reason why. I don't think we went through as much sibling rivalry as other parents go through with a new baby, because my oldest still had the closeness of nursing to fall back on.

But I sure wouldn't do it again, if I could get a do-over.

[MaryBeth @ Four Silly Sisters]

We found ourselves oops preggers when my oldest was just shy of a year old. We knew BF wasn't 100% effective BC, but weren't too concerned b/c our oldest was still nursing, but not exclusivelly, and my monthly visitor had not yet returned.

As it turned out for us, the first time I ovulated my body "hiccuped" and released 2 eggs. Both were fertilized and then one split.... leaving us triply blessed 17 months after we were blessed with number one. Four girls in under 1.5 years... be cautious using BF as birth control!

[Sara]

I found myself prego with #2 when #1 was just 4 months old and exclusively Bfed. BFing isn't always a valid birth control!!!

[Diane]

I got pregnant with #2 when #1 was 13 months. I hadn't planned on this, and nursing was so uncomfortable and physically draining that I weaned very quickly - so have a plan for this! Also, my cycle returned at exactly the same time (10 months postpartum) after both kids, even though I did many things differently with the younger one.

[T McQ]

I got pregnant with #2 when my oldest was about 9 months old. I was nursing her but she was also on table foods by then.

I got pregnant with #3 when #2 was about 4 months old. My period hadn't returned yet and he wasn't on any kinds of solids, although he'd been sleeping through the night since he was 3 weeks old so I only nursed during the day. My supply dipped and my milk changed when I got pregnant and before we realized I was pregnant, my son lost a lot of weight. He weighed less at 6 months than he did at 4 months. So if anyone out there is trying to get pregnant while your baby is still young enough to be exclusively breastfed, keep in mind that your milk may change!!

[Jenni]

I got pregnant with #2 while breastfeeding, but it was not until I night weaned my first and he started eating a lot of solids and got my period back. So, maybe night wean your little if you are ready and maybe your period will return.

[Susan]

Since Julie is WANTING to get pregnant, I think that she would have the best success by starting to use the Fertility Awareness method so she can identify when her body starts to ovulate. I don't know that there is anything she can do to speed up the process of getting her period back (other than weaning or cutting back on breastfeeding) but she can catch the first cycle if she's paying attention to the signs!

[Cara Fox]

Oooh - that totally reminds me, Susan - Linda and I should've suggested that she read "Taking Charge of Your Fertility", which describes this method. All of my kids were one-shot deals thanks to this book (although I somehow missed the signs with #2, which is how I accidentally became a Buncher) and I've recommended it to several friends, for all of whom it has worked like a charm!

Sidenote: This book is equally as useful for those who want to get pregnant as those who don't. Worth a read if fertility (or lack thereof) is of concern to you in any way.

[nursing shoes]

Hi, I enjoyed visiting your site and reading your intersting comments. I look forward to viewing more of your future updates.
thanks, VJ