solving your sleep challenges

Had I known before I had babies what level of sleep deprivation I was facing, I'm honestly not sure I would've had the guts to take the parenting plunge.  I've always been a girl who needs her sleep - never 12 straight hours, but the recommended solid 8.  Now, 6+ years into this parenting gig, I'm running on all cylinders at 6 and can make due with 5 consecutive hours a night for about 3 weeks before I crash - and then start the cycle all over again. 

I do feel compelled to give my children credit by saying that they are all good sleepers (or, rather, have been trained to be good sleepers).  Certainly, we have our fair share of bedtime battles (one more cup of water, PLEASE?) and the odd uber early rising or skipped nap, but for the most part they are pretty good. But like any other kids, they are thrown off by changes in routine due to illness, transition, and travel.  And since we are pretty much always either going through sickness, a major life change for someone (or all members of the family), or a trip - well, I guess that just explains why I'm sleep deprived despite the fact that I have good sleepers.

The biggest sleep challenge I face with my Bunch is travel.  Although our travel schedules slowed a bit until the youngest of our Bunch was two, with family scattered all across the country, two cross-country moves, and even a family reunion in another country, being flexible enough to travel has been a necessity for my kids.  Unfortunately, that doesn't always result in a good night's sleep for me.  Here are just a few of the sleep struggles we've faced when traveling with our Bunch and how we've solved them.

• Until about age 2, every baby needs a crib.  Lucky you if you co-sleep.  Otherwise, the best way we've found to get around this is to lug a pack-n-play along and borrow one (or a crib) on site.
• Until about age 2, every baby needs a separate sleeping area.  Be sure that sleeping accommodations either involve lots of bedrooms or closets/bathrooms big enough to hold pack-n-plays.  Is it gross to stick your kid in a bathroom?  Kinda.  But they can't touch anything from the pack-n-play and it means more sleep for you, so go with it.
• At any age, we need multiple rooms - otherwise mom and dad have to go to bed and rise at the same time as the babies, which means ZERO down time for mom and dad.  No parental down time + no sleep + babies off routine = disaster in the making.  When staying in hotels, we look for multi-bedroom suite set-ups (Embassy Suites is our fave).  After all, what's a little extra money at night in exchange for sanity the next day?
• Late bedtimes for my Bunch because exploring new places is so fun.  And really - who puts their kids to bed at 7 pm when visiting grandparents they only see twice a year?  After 6 years of traveling parent trial and error, we do now.  Put one parent in charge of gently reminding the other about the need to stick to sleep routines.
• Travel destinations are rarely baby-proofed.  To this day, even with older kids, I worry that once my babies outgrow the cribs, they will wander out of their assigned sleeping room and somehow get into trouble. Triple lock all doors and baby-proof as best you can (don't forget to watch out for TV cords they can trip over or dressers they can pull on themselves while you slumber peacefully).  If necessary, split up adult sleeping arrangements to be with/near each kid.  Recently, our kids all slept in the cushy king-sized Heavenly Bed while we slept on the lame foldout sofa in the front room of the suite.  That's because I didn't trust them not to get up in the morning and walk right out the front door of the hotel room without us hearing.  Safety first, at all costs.
• When my Bunch gets up, the whole house is woken up.  Put traveling companions on notice that traveling with you sucks - and this is just one of the many reasons why.  If they think they have it bad, they ought to try to be you - at least they get to go home to peace and quiet at the end of the trip.
• Somehow, no matter how hard we try, we are always one bed/sleeping space short of ideal conditions.  Be flexible and embrace the adventure.  We rarely allow our kids to sleep with us at home, so vacation is a good excuse for Hubs and I to split up in different beds and each snuggle with a kid.  And bear with the tiny feet that kick you and keep you up all night - consider it a flashback to sleeping while pregnant.
• We always think we've solved all these problems and we're gonna get more sleep.  Forget about getting enough sleep, even on vacation.  In 18 years, you can sleep all you want.  For now, live to serve your tiny masters.  Remember, they're only little once - fire up the coffee pot and enjoy it.

Baby Bunching wants to know:  what's been your biggest sleep challenge and how did you solve it?

Comments

[jean grow]

This was beautifully done, and I especially like the fact that you addressed the reactions of fellow vacationers! It took me a long time to realise that people actually believed our trip to see them would be (or even could be) relaxing and/or vacation-like. The best refreshment we've gotten on the road is at church... when all of my husband's friends take turns watching our kids for us during service! Other than that, it's all about survival. Thank you.

[Linda]

Ugh! I'm the parent that puts my kids to bed at 7 p.m. when traveling.....why? Because at 6 my oldest still doesn't sleep well in strange places and late bedtime means even less sleep, wake up early and then disaster for the day. So even on vacation, kids go to bed on time!

[Ruchi]

This is a timely post Cara as I am taking my bunch(26 mnths and 5 mnths to India in Nov)for the first time.I am making a mental note of all these points.