Q: I was wondering if anyone knows of a play group for baby bunching families in my area. I just moved to Charleston, SC, and would like to meet other families in similar circumstances.
A: Moving can be very difficult in the early stages of Baby Bunching. Linda did it twice, and it's not easy. Having the right support network is critical to making Baby Bunching bearable successful. Back in the day when our grandmas and great grandmas were churning out 'Irish Twins' they also had family around to help them out and care for the kids. Yeah, not anymore. We're the generation of do-it-on-your-own with family three time zones away. This can make Baby Bunching difficult and lonesome at times.
Don't take finding a network of friends in your similar situation lightly. Baby Bunchers have to stick together. The best playgroups are the ones where, with your friends, you're greater than the sum of all your parts. Meaning, you may arrive in and leave in chaos, but while you're together everything is better and easier simply because you have each other.
The trick to getting the process going is to find the mom who seems well connected to many different groups. She's the one who will know about mom's groups, playgroups, play dates, preschools, doctors, etc. One of the easiest and quickest ways to find these women is at the playground. Try to hit the toddler-friendly playgrounds when most naps are over—that’s the 4 to 5 p.m. range. Same for the weekends. It may take a few playgrounds or few trips to find fellow Baby Bunchers, but eventually you will stumble upon the right playground/time of day when there are lots of potential mommy and children friends.
Another great way to meet Baby Bunchers is to join a moms group. MOMS Club, Mothers and More, and MOPS, and Mocha Moms are all examples of national organizations that have local chapters with monthly meeting, planned activities, age-appropriate playgroups, etc. Each has a unique focus/approach (faith-based, strictly for stay-at-home moms, etc., etc.) and the activity level of the group varies from chapter to chapter, so it may take a few tries to luck into the "right" group that matches your personality/needs, but stay the course.
There are also geographic-specific message boards on larger websites out there (MomsLikeMe, BabyCenter, Meetup, CityMommy, The Bump, etc.) spring to mind as examples that may feel a little more removed initially because they're virtual, but often feature groups that gel online and meet IRL down the line.
Baby classes, such as The Music Class, Gymboree, and The Little Gym, are all divided by ages and a great (if pricier, especially once the younger of your Bunch comes along) way to meet other moms. Local community centers often offer similar classes at a more affordable rate. And don't forget about library story hour! (If you feel brave enough to venture that direction.)
We're convinced that Baby Bunchers can spot each other a mile away. There's no secret handshake, although that is interesting idea. If you're looking for a playgroup and haven't found yet that suits you, start your own with people you meet along the way. Meeting up a playground is great if everyone is of the appropriate age (meaning kids who are 9 months old tend to not enjoy the playground as much as those who are 2 years old). If the playground situation stresses you out, look for other venues: mall play area, indoor playgrounds, etc.
Thank God for the Web now because Facebook can actually help you connect on a more local level. Just googling Charleston Mom's Group pulled up two good resources: Charleston Mommies and Mom's in the Know, which has a Facebook Fan page of local moms.
If you're looking to find other Baby Bunching moms in your area or have more suggestions on where to find them, give a shout here - we would love to see our little community grow IRL!
I'd like to know who wrote the response here on this posting. I'm the organizer of a playgroup on Meetup.com. I would love to to quote a couple of sentences to use as part of my signature on my playgroup email. I'd like permission and I want to give proper credit! This is the sentence I just love:
"The best playgroups are the ones where, with your friends, you're greater than the sum of all your parts. Meaning, you may arrive and leave in chaos, but while you're together everything is better and easier simply because you have each other."
It really says it all and is why I believe that our group is so awesome.
Thanks so much!
Shannon
Playtime Pals Playgroup Organizer
Posted by: Shannon Farese | Mar 17, 2010 at 09:45 PM