Q: Currently, I have 1 toddler who is 19 months and another child who is 4 months. We've all just mastered our little dance our loading the kids in the car. One goes in the big boy car seat while the other... one goes via infant car seat into a base. We've also figured out how to maneuver the grocery store with one sitting up in front and the other one in the cart in the car seat.
What happens to my life when littlest one gets too big to fit into the car seat and I have to carry both. Right now my toddler books it every time his sneaks hit the floor. What happens when that both get to walking. How to you get the older one to stay right next to you?
A: When my first child started to near the weight limit on his infant bucket seat, I immediately felt the need to bump him up to a more comfortable ride. Enter the convertible car seat. But my poor second child was literally busting out of her infant seat before I was ready to give in and move her out. Why? Because infant seat meant she was transferable from car to home, home to car, car to shopping cart, etc. Once she was out the seat, I would be left with two kids to contend with in parking lots or even in my own foyer.
My youngest was just about nine months old when I realized the infant seat was just WAY too small for her physique. Of course, she outgrew that bucket seat right about the time that Alex started a preschool where I had to walk him in (up a snowy hill) everyday. Super convenient. Moving her up to the convertible car seat meant I had to look into buying another one since my oldest was only two at the time.
It can be very difficult to deal with two toddlers who are loose and on the prowl and possibly darting into traffic.
The answer to your question is you become creative and quick on your feet. A few things to note and then I hope other Baby Bunchers will chime in:
--Drive thrus can be your best friend. I didn't have anything I could drive through, but you'd be amazed how far I would drive just for that convenience.
--Parking close to the store or a cart corral is critical. I would often drive around and wait so I could be right next to all the carts so I could literally lift one from point A to point B without having to go very far.
--Invest in a carrier. Ergo holds kids up to a decent weight. Have your littlest one get adjusted to life in this sooner rather than later. This will ensure at least one is strapped to you past the infant stage.
--Make sure you have a double stroller. Pull it out of the car and load them both up one at a time. If your oldest is a darter into traffic then load him in first and strap him in. Then put the little one in once you know he's safely in his seat.
--Grocery store visits will change. You will have one up front still and the second may have to ride in the Ergo on your back or sit in the cart part...not ideal, but you do what you have to. I have seen moms pushing two carts around with both kids. If you are coordinated enough for that, go for it!
--You may be able to play games with them as they get older. One mom I knew put a sticker on her car and when she was messing with the youngest told her oldest to touch his hand to the sticker. This may work for some kids so try it. (I could hear mine laughing at my hysterically....hold the sticker? Are you crazy?!) Another mom calls the parking medians "islands" and if you walk in the parking lot/street it's considered shark infested water. So they run from place to place. This worked well when my kids were 3.
Please let us know what suggestions you have for life after the infant seat.
We were just talking about the (not) so good old days of the run-away toddlers yesterday. Our 2.5 year old is still doing it but THANKFULLY our 4 year old has outgrown the desire to ditch us in parking lots. Those days were exhausting!
I second the Ergo and/or a sling. I found the sling great for quick trips in/out as it didn't require any special maneuvering. The Ergo was mainly used for longer trips or hiking with #2.
We waited WAY too long to get a double stroller and that is one of my biggest regrets. Live and learn! Once we had the double (we chose the Graco Quattro Duo since it fit in our trunk) it made life a lot easier by having the ability to keep them both safe & buckled in when out and about. Then we later moved into a Pliko3 with a jumper board and we still have that stroller for travel or long shopping trips. The youngest runaway is strapped in and the older one can ride on the back when she gets tired or just walk beside the stroller.
Good luck with whatever you decide :)
Posted by: Mamameah | Jan 21, 2010 at 09:40 PM
My bunch is 20 months and 9 months right now and we moved our youngest to a convertible car seat about a month ago. When we go shopping, I strap my biggest in the seat and put my little one in the cart. She's content to hang on and ride while my biggest wanted to literally jump out at a moment's notice. Whenever possible, I use the family sized carts that have seat belts for 2+ kids. And I always park right beside a cart in the parking lot to make the transfer easier.
In addition to my double stroller (BOB duallie), I always keep a small umbrella stroller in my car. I use it when I'm in a pinch or need to get in and out of somewhere quickly. I carry one kid and strap the other one in the stroller. This works well when I have to take them both into a doctor's office, post office, or somewhere there's not room for the double stroller.
My biggest dilemma of late has been getting them both out of the car (with their bags) and into daycare. I've tried several options -- 1.) carrying them both and coming back for bags 2.) carrying my little one and carrying bags, holding biggest's hand (which was a complete disaster because he didn't want to be pulled into the building that day) 3.) calling ahead and having the director meet me at the car to assist (worked best, but not always an option).
I like to wear my kids, too. I don't have a Ergo (unfortunately) but I love my slings. The only problem I've found is that it kills my back to be wearing one of them and then try to lift the other into or out of the cart, off the floor, into the car.
Posted by: Lindsey | Jan 21, 2010 at 09:46 PM
whatever you do, don't move the littlest one until he/she can sit up in the carts! My bunch is 16 months apart and the youngest hated the bucket seat. Desperate to make any ride in the car more enjoyable I moved him to a convertible seat around 5.5 months. I had 2-3 weeks of trying to prop him up in the cart until he was finally able to do it on his own.
I do have an Ergo, but find it tricky to get him on my back without help. He isn't a fan of the front anymore. Thankfully they are old enough now that the oldest one can walk/ride in the cart bucket (which she loves) and the youngest one sits contently. Most of the time :)
Now, I am about a month away from 2 walkers. That is what scares me the most!!
Posted by: annie | Jan 21, 2010 at 10:08 PM
Hmm - I have a 19 month gap between mine and it may not feel like it now, but before long your toddler will be a steadier walker and even be able to climb up to his car seat; it's likely this will happen by the time your baby is on his feet. The main issue as you say is having them stand by you safely without scooting off. I did use a soft velcro wrist link strap (I know feelings run high on leashes) but mainly it was a case of practicing over and again how they needed to behave on the driveway and car parks in particular. It sounds tricky but even at a young age they can start to understand and once you have the next routine established you'll wonder what you were worrying about. Also - we never had a double stroller, although we did switch to a supermarket delivery service.
Posted by: Natasha | Jan 22, 2010 at 06:19 AM
I was never a fan of lugging the heavy infant seat and got used to using carriers for the baby early. When she was little, I used a pouch sling, then moved her up to the ergo, front or back depending on her mood. Though mastering the back carry took a bit of time, after a while, I could get in on easily. Of course, I would get the little one strapped on first. My two little ones are older now (2 and just turned 4) so we do actually walk in hand in hand now, or I use a single for my little one. My 4 year old can walk beside the cart, and his sister rides. Thankfully neither is a runner like their older brother (7) was.
Posted by: Heather | Jan 22, 2010 at 07:57 AM
I do much of my shopping at discount groceries where you get to the front and they ring up your items and toss them in a cart, then you take that cart and leave your cart there for the next person.
I would put baby on the front in a sling or moby wrap, and toddler on my back in the mei tai. I just stopped doing that because my almost two year old is steady enough on his feet to walk well and hold my hand in and out of the store, and coordinated enough to put his feet in the holes of the seat on his own when I pick him up. Plus their combined weights had reached 45 lbs... but it honestly was the easiest way for me to shop at the discount grocery, thrift stores, etc.
Now I frequently put the baby on my back and that makes it much easier to lift the toddler into the cart.
Posted by: Natalie @ Naddy's Blog | Jan 22, 2010 at 09:16 AM
Well, our oldest (turned 2 on tuesday) has never been a runaway so loading in the car at home in our driveway on a very low traffic/no through traffic street has never been an issue. Especially since the baby has been worn in one carrier or another since birth! I do use the cart coral trick at the store. Except for Costco though with carts that fit two, the older one rides in the cart and I wear the younger in a carrier. Places without carts I either wear both or the older walks. This month though, we're getting a minivan which should make getting in even easier (and drier.) Stick both kiddos in, climb in behind and shut the door, then proceed to chase them through the van to get them in their seats! :D
Posted by: Molly | Jan 22, 2010 at 01:04 PM
We always had (have) a touch the car rule. Once, in what I thought was moment of inspiration, I told the kids they could end up "flat as a pancake" if they ran into traffic. Instead they just like to chant that when we get out of the car. When my baby moved into the seat of the cart (and out of her carseat) I started shopping at the store with the little red car on the front of the cart. Saving ten cents on something dropped in priority when it became of shopping or not shopping. Sometime I would also let my toddler "push" the cart. This worked well, though I had to have a hand on the cart at ALL times, or displays and people were in danger of life and limb.
The other option was to go shopping at night when DH was home. Sometimes this was a treat - a relaxing stroll down an aisle takes on new meaning when you have three kids three and under at home. :-)
Posted by: sierra | Jan 22, 2010 at 02:18 PM
I had a hard time with this too since my kids are both runners. What I do is put my son (who is older) in his side of the car (with a book) and not buckle him in while I walk around and put his sister in her seat. Then I go back and strap him in before taking off.
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