Mom Blog and Baby Blog | Baby Bunching

woes of a traveling baby buncher

Typically here on Baby Bunching we aim to offer two things: 1) tips and tricks for survival and 2) support.  However, I feel compelled to forewarn you that today's post is strictly a vent.  Rest assured that we will offer plenty of tips and tricks for making the most of the holiday season with your Bunch, but today's post is just a bitch-fest from Cara about how much it sucks to be a traveling Baby Buncher.  If you are one of those blessed enough to live near family and avoid traveling for the holidays and cannot in any way identify with this post, consider this a small gift from God to make your life as a Baby Buncher infinitely easier.

We have just returned from a perfectly lovely long holiday weekend, where a number of our very dearest family members worked so hard to put on a picture-perfect Thanksgiving, followed by the absolutely delightful holiday weekend wedding of my sister. They were really, really lovely events and by all accounts were enjoyed by all in attendance.  Except for me and my husband.

You see, we dragged our Bunch and their little brother, The Caboose, over 600 miles by car to attend said events.  We briefly contemplated traveling by air, but decided that this had the capacity to be a disaster of even greater proportions.  Traveling with my kids sucks because:

1) Packing in and of itself is a multi-day affair.  No matter how organized I am, we just have a lot of stuff.  It takes awhile to pack the pack-n-play, the sleep aids (oscillating fan, white noise machine, etc.), the portable booster, the stroller, the diaper bag, the toy bag, the food bag, the overnight bag (so we don't have to drag everything into the hotel on the way up) and the freaking suitcases full of clothes.  And the youngest is even old enough that we have dropped the pump/formula/baby food bag.  I am absolutely mortified to say that my MINIVAN is actually not a large enough vehicle to transport my crew and their gear.  Traveling by plane would be even worse, as at $25 a checked bag, it would be cheaper to charter a plane to transport all this shit than fly commercial.

2) One of my children (typically the baby and sometimes myself, too) gets sick every time we travel.  Can I just say how great it is to spend the beginning of every trip not sleeping for 3 days and checking out every Urgent Care and pharmacy in the flipping country!??!

3) Once we get there, we are in vacation mode but we still have children.  We have so many awesome, well-intended relatives that offer to help out once we get there, but the bottom line is that the kids are still our responsibility...in an unfamiliar, unstructured, un-baby-proofed environment.  The scenario is always the same:  lovely event that has all the makings of a good time.  Long-lost relative/friend that i haven't seen in forever sidles up and says, "It's so good to see you!  How've you been?"  I begin to answer the question and then notice that one of the children has crawled/toddled/sprinted (depending on age) out of my line of vision.  Excuse myself to chase after said child, calling, "Great!  How have you been!  Would love to hear!"  In a decade, maybe, when I can have a freaking uninterrupted conversation.

4)  Despite the abundance of free babysitters, there is no break.  This is because all of the stolen moments that hubby and I count on to get us through the day (nap time, computer time while boys are at school and baby plays quietly in baby-proofed area, early bedtime for kids, hot bath and wine after kids go to bed) never happen because there is a flurry of fun activities that keep us from sticking to our schedule.  And what kind of a Grinchy parent sends their kids to bed at 7 pm when there's a flock of relatives that only get to see them twice a year lining up to play with them?

5) Fortunately, we have awesome family members who are always willing to babysit.  Unfortunately, we are bone-tired and passed out on the couch before our kids have even begun to wind down for the evening.

6) On the ride home there is no backup.  Only hundreds of miles of open road and three small children yammering for snacks, videos, potty breaks, and release from car seat harnesses.

7) And when we get home, it's immediately back to the old grind.  Which almost seems relaxing after a "vacation".

making memories this season

The holidays with little ones can be crazy. Just getting presents bought, wrapped and shipped, and Christmas cards out on time can be about all a new mom can handle. And for the past four Christmases our family has been doing the bare minimum to get festive. Only half the decorations come out, very little baking is done and gifts are bought online to save time.

Last year when my oldest was almost five, I decided it was time to start making some memories and teaching Christmas to my kids. It was clear they were understanding more and more about Santa. But I wanted them to get the whole holiday in more than just a commercial context. So that meant a little reflection on my part. What things are important for me to share about this season with preschoolers?

December can be filled with shopping and spending or it can be about savoring the lights, colors, songs, smells and tastes of this month. Because once January and February comes, it continues to be cold and it’s back to business as usual.

I had read in magazine article about a mom who did an activity a day with her kids during Advent in lieu of candy/gifts everyday. We’ve done the candy Advent calendars and still do because it’s just fun to have chocolate, but as we did last year, this year we'll take our wooden Advent calendar and fill it with fun things for us to do together as a family. Things that, for me, make the season what it is. So here were our 24 days of activities (we have altered a bit this year):

Make paper snowflakes and decorate the windows
Learn/sing some traditional Christmas carols
Decorate the house with decorations
Make a gingerbread house
Make Christmas cookies for a friend
Celebrate St. Nicholas Day (Dec. 6)
Decorate the Christmas tree
Read a Christmas classic
Do something nice for someone we don’t know
Look at Christmas lights
Bring food to someone who needs it
Attend a Christmas concert
Celebrate St. Lucia Day (Dec. 13)
Attend a Christmas event
Make a popcorn garland
Read the Christmas story
Do something nice for your brother/sister (share a toy, make a drawing, let him/her take a turn first)
Make hot chocolate
Watch a Christmas movie
Make a Christmas paper chain and hang it
Hang lights up in the house
Family game night
Buy a toy for a child who doesn’t have one
Unwrap/open one present each

By doing these, our family gets some dedicated time together. But we’ve turned Christmas “chores” into fun activities. I even had them wrapping presents and helping to stamp the Christmas cards.

 

the bunch is 'shackin up' for the holidays

Traveling to visit family shouldbe an easy affair since it is your family. [cue: crazy laughter!] Holiday traveling is about bonding with one another in more ways than one. Quirky habits are unveiled to the world when everyone is stuffed in a room, sleeping on the floor and maneuvering the day on little sleep. Linda's kids (now 4 and 5) have only recently adjusted to 1) sleeping in the same room/bed 2) sleeping in a new place. Previously, in any new location, they would go to sleep late and wake up extra early leaving everyone tired and irritated for the first 24-36 hours anywhere. Cara's kids were conditioned from the beginning to sleep anywhere on anything. Linda is jealous.

Baby Bunchers have unique considerations when it comes to lodging because they can't risk A) their kids waking each other up, B) their kids waking other people up, C) other people waking their kids up. As we all know, the Baby Bunching machine is a finely oiled one, and it typically doesn't allow for sleep cycles to stray off course.  Sleep deprivation + Baby Bunch = nuclear meltdown.

Keep a few things in mind:

• Lodging away from home, in the long run, is a growing experience for everyone. Kids need to learn how to adapt to new situations. If you anticipate it will be a horrible experience for all, stay a brief amount of time and head back. Sometimes being on the road is better than being crammed into a small space with multiple kids....at least until they're older.

• Think outside the box on sleep arrangements. Perhaps toddler could sleep with a favorite aunt or grandma. Baby isn't picky about surroundings, many times a closet or bathroom will keep toddler (or older kids) from waking up the baby. Maybe even you can be the one to take to the floor on an inflatable bed in the living room. Don't feel confined by the number of bedrooms of a house.

• Get your gear loaded up because you probably need extra equipment to lodge your Bunch for the night or two. 1) Bring the bed. We're big fans of the pack n' play. But we just saw this inflatable toddler bedfeatured at Cool Mom Picks.  Genius! It might help reduce the number of portable cribs you have to stuff in the car. 2) Noise machine. If you don't have one, get one. It makes away from home easier if you can drown out the noise.

• Bring your sense of humor because not everyone will have one. Getting baby and toddler to sleep in a new place can be challenging.

 

product highlight: tag*a*long your bunch

Stroller configurations (single + sling, tandem, twin, single + boogie board, sit and stand, single + roaming child) can be tricky as your Bunch grows. We have often said there is not one perfect double stroller out there...yet. If your Bunch is still little, you may think you have found the perfect one, but as they grow you realize the weight of the older one will make a twin hard to push, the attitude of one will make a tandem hard to negotiate and without fail someone will decide the stroller just isn't for them anymore!

As your kids grow bigger, the options for containment grow smaller. This is why I squealed with delight when I saw Rookie Mom's review about this new stroller accessory: the tag*a*long.

This is such a simple concept, and we're glad to see someone put this into practice at a low price ($10). The tag*a*long is basically a plastic handle that attaches to the side of your stroller so your child can hang on to the stroller--without actually pushing the stroller into people or getting run over by the wheel. Maybe that wheel thing is my own error.

This handy gadget was developed by Naptime Industries, a mom and dad design team from Philadelphia with their own young kids. Here are a few tag*a*long bits:

• It provides an option for older siblings or those kids who can walk and do not want to sit in the stroller.
• The attachment requires no tools and will fit on most strollers. It's quick loop-through design makes it quick and easy to get on and off.
• It's made in the USA and is lead and BPA free. Bonus in case your baby wants to suck on it, too.  

Even better, this seems like a great product for those with three children who are maneuvering a double and still need some assistance reigning in the oldest. I love that this gives kids a designated spot to return to and sets the expectations and directs boundaries. It doesn't guarantee your oldest from wandering off but the tag*a*long will provide him a place to hold while moving about and a place to come back to when the fun is done.

As you know with all things Baby Bunching, we only review what we feel is appropriate for those with closely spaced siblings. (We did not receive a sample nor were we paid by the company for this review. Although, they did graciously offer us a few to sample.)

Let us know if you've tried this out yet!

baby bunching bests

A few things to update our readers. One, please check us out over at The Washington Times Communities this week. Woo hoo! We love comments on posts so feel free to chime in. Also, we will get things posted when we can this week. Cara is traveling and Linda is hosting Thanksgiving for her family + many more.

Heather over at Rookie Moms has a few tips for getting your toys organized. We love cleaning tips, especially before (and after) the holidays.

Katja over at Skimbaco Lifestyle had a post with all kinds of Advent Calendars that I'm coveting. I'm a sucker for these. And my kids seem to have at least one Advent Calendar in each room of our house.

Casey over at Half As Good As You has a most digesting story about her recent trip to Gymboree. Make sure you're not eating when you read this. Funny thing is I'm never amazed at the amount of stories I read involving poop anymore. But I do feel your pain. Although, this one is a new one for me. Gross.

April over at April's Little Family is indeed SuperMom this week. With her now--three under three--she's appears to be moving along as usual with all five of them heading to EPCOT, twice. We're amazed and impressed.

baby bunching challenge: all around the dinner table: part II (getting there)

Yesterday we covered how to get everyone around the table, but sometimes the hardest part is getting the food there in the first place. Rushing put dinner on the table with a screaming hungry infant and a toddler underfoot is no fun at all. Over the years, we've learned that the key to dinner time sanity is simplification and pre-prep. 

No matter how much you may love to cook (and we both do), your culinary skills are lost on your toddler. Again, that's not to say that you have to eat garbage all the time, but cut yourself some slack and save the fancier dishes or experimentation for the weekend when your hubby is around to entertain the kids.

Regarding pre-prep, there are are a few ways to get ahead of yourself so the witching dinner hour isn't such a mess.

• Cara's personal favorite (on days she doesn't work) is to start dinner at naptime--even if that's morning naptime. It may seem strange weird, but getting this done without the wee ones underfoot will save you later on. Start crockpot meals in the morning with chopping and dicing done the night before.
• Menu planning is key.  Sit down on the weekend, plan out what you're going to eat and when, and stick it on your fridge for daily reference.  As a bonus, planning ahead means that if you are REALLY organized, you can cross-reference with the grocery circular to plan around what's on sale and maybe save some money too!
• Cook double meals on the weekends. Things such as meatloaf, meatballs, casseroles, chili, soup and pasta sauces double and freeze well. It's no extra work to make twice as much at once and then you can pull something yummy and homemade out of the freezer on a busy night instead of driving thru!
• Cook a bunch of meat (ground beef, chicken, etc.) at once, divide into meal-sized portions and freeze.  You can then easily defrost later and make spaghetti, tacos, chicken soup, etc.
• Keep cooked pasta in the fridge to toss quickly with shrimp (sold ready-to-eat – peeled and de-veined)/chicken/beef and fresh veggies such as baby spinach, tomatoes, onions and peppers.
• Buy packaged, pre-washed, read-to-eat vegetables. They cost a bit more but will save you time in the end.
• Always keep spaghetti sauce on hand.
• Especially in the summer time when it's too hot for the oven, throw the entire meal (meat/fish, vegetable, potato) on the grill.  Drizzle with olive oil and wrap in foil or put on a skewer and cook directly on the grill. Foil packets can also be baked in the oven…easy cleanup is a bonus!

And of course, if you’re not a fan of cooking, there are numerous meal assembly services to help you pre-make weeks worth of meals at a time (A Dinner A’Fare, Super Suppers, My Girlfriend’s Kitchen, Let's Dish, etc.)  These are actually reasonably priced if you do them in bulk or split an order with a friend.  One caveat – they are delicious for grownups, but sometimes not the most toddler-friendly foods, so choose your entrees carefully.  Also know up front that most of them involve only the main dish and a cooking time of at least 20 minutes, so you will still need to allow time for them to cook and plan for side dishes. But, hey – that beats slaving over the whole meal for hours of prep, cooking, and cleanup, right?

What have we missed - we're always looking for ways to simplify, so do share your tips and tricks!

baby bunching challenge: all around the dinner table, part I

We received this question from Baby Buncher Jeanette.

Q: I'm looking for advice for dinnertime. I have a 2 1/2 year old and a 10 month old (19 months apart). Basically so far I've survived by feeding everyone at different times (including me and my husband!). This keeps the chaos at bay but I would love to get us all at the table for some together time. Oh, and the toddler the toddler has now decided she should sit in the highchair again, ugh. So the baby is left to roam the floor while I cook. Any suggestions? Is it unrealistic?

A: This is a two part question - A) How to get everyone to eat together and B) How to get dinner ready with a baby/toddler underfoot.  Because we have lots to say on this, we're going to break it down into two separate posts.  Today's focus is on getting everyone to eat together.

We're big supporters of the importance of family dinners - so much that although both of our husbands frequently work late into the evening, we force ourselves to make a "real" dinner and sit down with the kids every night, rather than foraging on the fly.  Sitting around the table with your family is important for so many reasons besides just eating. A meal together teaches table manners and prompts mealtime conversation, which are good lifetime habits to develop. Plus your kids begin to learn dinnertime routines of washing hands, saying a blessing, toasting and cleaning up the dishes. We know that very young children are messy, demanding, and have short attention spans when it comes to sitting through a meal and  it is not super enjoyable all the time.  We also know that especially for Baby Bunchers, dining as a family can be hard because the wee ones are on different feeding schedules or are starving at an early dinner hour before you and/or your spouse are both home for the evening.  Having said that, we believe family dinner is important, so here's some food for thought.

Your youngest is likely eating real food by now, and it’s fun to expose him/her to new tastes, textures and the whole dining experience.  The most important advice we have for you is to offer a pre-fixed, not ala carte, menu.  Do NOT get into the habit of making different dinners for everyone.  Make the meal you have planned, although you might have to look at how you could make more kid-friendly dishes. We’re not talking about chicken nuggets and pizza every night, but plan to include at least one thing you know your kids will eat--sweet potatoes, chicken, pasta, rice, applesauce, etc.  People can either eat or not.  No one will starve from not eating, but if you knock yourself out catering to everyone’s preferences, you will drop from exhaustion.  Expose them to different healthy foods again and again – eventually they will find ones they like (or at least tolerate enough to eat).  

We're also firm believers in not hovering over kids and trying to force-feed them.  Of course, they must eat a healthy variety of foods and steer clear of junk.  But some kids eat earlier in the day and aren't hungry at dinner.  Don't force the clean plate club issue - the more you make food an issue, the more it becomes a power struggle for kids and makes the dining experience miserable for everyone.

Regarding seating arrangements, we love the little booster seats that strap on chairs in lieu of full-scale high chairs, if you need a second seat.  They are inexpensive, portable, and easy to move on/off chairs in case you need extra seating for adults.  But consider strapping even active toddlers into boosters.  Frequently, having everyone strapped down is the key to extending the dinner process.  

As with all things Baby Bunching, have realistic expectations.  At this age, don't expect your kids to sit at the table for an hour and converse politely about the day's events.  Don't even expect that you will be able to tell your husband about your day uninterrupted.  Expect food on the floor, knocked over sippies, whining about vegetable consumption, and bolting from the table.  Honestly, our Bunches were 3 and 4 before we had what we thought was a reasonably enjoyable meal with them.  In the meantime, try to add structure to meals like you do to the rest of the day - start with a blessing or other "convening" comments, ask everyone about their day (we play Sad, Glad or Mad at our house - everyone has to say one thing they were sad, glad or mad about that day and it sparks conversation), and encourage toddlers to ask permission to be excused and then carry their (non-breakable) dishes to the sink when the meal is over.  The dining experience is as much about socialization as nutrition.

As we mentioned before, if hubby gets home too late for everyone to eat dinner, together, at least sit down with the kids yourself. Or if dinner is too hard for everyone to do together, try to do another meal all together. 

Most importantly.....cut yourself some slack and leave the clean up until after the kids are in bed.

kodak party in da house!

Cara recently took part in a Kodak Gallery house party hosted by her mom and scored fifty 40% off coupons for Kodak Gallery orders (including prints, which were recently lowered to 9 cents a print)!  Because the holidays are coming up and there’s nothing a Baby Buncher loves more than to plaster the faces of her precious darlings all over her holiday cards (and mugs, and mouse pads, and photo books, etc.), thought we’d share them with you.  To get one (which is good for your entire order), here’s what you have to do:

• Tweet and either link back to one of our posts or to us (@babybuncher or @babybuncher2)
• If you’re not on Twitter, blog or Facebook the term and link back to us
• Email us when you’ve done it.  This part, while an extra step that kind of sucks, is critical because we only have 50 coupon codes so we’re sending them to the first 50 Bunchers we hear from.  The easiest way for us to time stamp these is with an email.

If you’re one of the first 50, we’ll send you an email with your 40% off coupon code.  They expire on December 1, so tackle this quickly so you have plenty of time to peruse the offerings and get your order in.

Happy shopping and be sure to save one of your holiday cards for us – we’d love to see your Bunch all dolled up!

time change: falling back into a different routine

We're over at the Washington Times Communities this week talking about the recent time change and what we love and hate about it being dark so early. Ok, we know Day Light Savings ended a few weeks ago now, but we're still adjusting. Are you? Let us know how.

baby bunching bests

It's been a busy week for us IRL so a quiet one on Baby Bunching, but we didn't want to forget our bests!  Happy Friday - hope everyone has a great weekend!

I'm glad to see I'm not the only one that struggles to get my Bunch to/through church.  Rashida at A Shorter Story has multiple posts chronicling her Bunch's triumphant return to church after a Baby Bunching-induced hiatus.

Extreme Baby Buncher Ninja Mommy with 3 under 3 and another 2 hanging off the side is our hero.  She's also housebound, thanks to the various stages the members of her Bunch are in.  Repeat after us:  this too shall pass, this too shall pass...

And in honor of Veteran's Day earlier this week, a shout out to Baby Buncher military mommy Michelle and her recently-minted Major husband, Dave.  We're so grateful for not only those who serve in the military, but for their families who sacrifice time with their loved ones for the sake of our country.  It's hard enough being a Buncher and even harder doing it solo.  We heart you, Michelle, Dave, and Bunch!