sleep, babies, sleep. together, please.

Busy past couple of weeks for your Baby Bunching blog hosts, including an annoyingly timed surgery for Cara and the start of school for her Bunch, as well as a beach vacation for Linda (who still has a few more weeks of summer left to weather - yikes!).  This has left us with not a lot of time for getting posts up, so we're thanking Baby Buncher Brenda for sending us this question.

Q:  Could we pose a question to the blog about how to get baby #1 to begin sharing a room with baby #2?  I've got a 22 month old who was a preemie (a 25 weeker) and a 4.5 month old - who isn't sleeping through the night - but I'm hoping that will come soon.

A:  Ah, the eternal room-sharing question, complicated by the  "not sleeping through the night" angle.  This is a tough one.  We're sorry to tell you, Brenda, that we do not have experience with this specific scenario.  Cara's Bunch DOES share a room, but she waited until they were both sleeping through the night and in big boy beds (youngest was just barely 2) before bunking them together.  She actually recently considered moving all three boys (5, 4, and 1) into a super-sized attic room together, but decided against it because even though the baby sleeps through the night, he is still easily awoken by his brother's shenanigans. 

We've fielded a question with a similar angle in the past, so check out our that post, which included suggestions to:

• leave both babies in their cribs as long as possible
• get a white noise machine to drown out the noises each of them might make
• begin the transition at night (which usually includes a longer stretch of sounder sleep), rather than at naps
• considering napping in separate rooms (i.e. putting one child in your bedroom) to preserve nap time sanity when they can see each other in the daylight

Of course, we're betting there is someone out there who has been in this exact same boat, so help a girl out, ladies (and gentlemen, of course), and chime in with your suggestions!

 

 

 

Comments

[Natasha]

My youngest slept through at 3 months and went in with her sister, 22 months. If they have woken in the night/early they have never disturbed each other & even when they got big enough to chat at night they would chat themselves to sleep. I would put them down for naps in the same room together at the same time every afternoon (sneaking in to get the eldest up once she didn't need so long a nap!) It has helped sustain a lovely bond. I understand it's not like this for everyone...

[sierra]

Until two years ago, we had all three in one room at night (tho the younger two napped in seperate rooms).
We used the white noise machine and put the baby (6 mos) into his crib after his last night feeding - 8pm. The other two had been asleep for at least an hour and a half at that point, so baby's fussing didn't normally wake them.
We also explained (as well as we could to a 22 month old and 3 1/2 year old) that "sometimes babies just cry" and that they were to ignore it and stay in their own beds. It worked really well most of the time and my daughter (almost seven) still talks about sharing a room with the boys and misses the fun and games.

[geekymummy]

My son moved into his sisters room when he was about 3 months and she was 27 months. He didn't sleep through the night until he was 12 months old, but he rarely woke his sister, I would just go in and nurse him and put him down again without my toddler awakening at all.
I would put them to bed at around the same time (7.30), fortunalet the baby was easy to put down, I would put him down first, just nurse him then pop him in the crib. Then I read my daughter her stories and put her to bed. He liked to listen to his sisters bedtime stories (and has a passion for books now at 18 months!)
I probably perpetuated the night feeding though, because I went in as soon as I heard a peep from him. We did end up doing 4-5 days of ferber training to get him to sleep through, and brought our daughter into our bed for when we did that.

[Desirée Spenst]

We have an almost 5-month-old that we'd like to put in with our just 2-year-old, who is in a big boy bed. I do worry that my dream feed at 10-11 pm might wake up DS, but I think he will get used to it. I'd love to hear more stories of baby bunches sharing rooms!

[Carla]

I tried to put my older 2 in a room together, but my 15mo old stopped sleeping at 7mo. She had us all totally fooled, too. She was an amazing baby who STTN from the day she was born. Then, at 7mo, it all changed and she has barely slept since. We had to move her out of the room because she was keeping my older one up.

So, now, my older DD (just turned 2 in June) has her own room and the 15mo old has her own room and the 3mo old is still in the co-sleeper in my room.

I have no idea what to do since it appears my 15mo isn't going to be able to share a room because she simply doesn't sleep. Ever.

I'm considering that #1 and #3 might have to share?? I don't know.

The pediatrician thinks it might be night terrors, but she's too young for that. We've tried 3 different reflux medications in case that's it. We've tried Tylenol and Motrin in case it's teeth. Nothing. She still screams at the top of her lungs for the better part of the night.

Maybe she's doing it on purpose to ensure she gets her own room!

[RookieMom Whitney]

When my kids (not technically Bunched) were 6 months and 3 years old, they shared a room while we lived through a remodeling project. The baby really needed to be sleep trained and we let her cry it out while her brother slept through it. She screamed her head of for 30 minute sessions on a regular basis (she was immune to the training program) and he never woke up. They're all different!

Jump ahead 2 years and she sleeps great, while my nearly 5 year old wakes up every night and comes to visit us. I'm thinking of putting them back in the same room, wondering if he'll stop waking up if he's not so lonely.