outings: haven't we been here before

It's safe to say that I still celebrate a successful outing with the kids. They are much more frequent than they used to be. I used to risk life and limb just to get out and every tenth outing might be a good one. (Meaning: no one was injured, we had minor meltdowns, nothing was stolen or broken, everyone got home alive and not crying.) We're not talking very high standards.

Cara and I used to laugh that a day left with no plans had potential to go awry very quickly. But since school has been out, we've kind of been taking things easy. I love not having "things to do" or errands to run in a limited time. My mistake since we've hit 10 days of this game.

So when we woke up yesterday to a sunny warm day, I decided we'd embrace the pretty weather and head out. Mistake: I hadn't arranged anything ahead of time. Hubby left super early for work. The kids and I had a leisurely breakfast. We spent some time coloring and using the puppets my babysitter made the day before, while I worked, to do a puppet show. The kids started getting antsy so I started to move on with the day.

--During clean up of the breakfast dishes, I broke up two fights from the twiblings--one that required a time out.

--Told the kids we were going out and to get dressed (yes, they can do it themselves if I pick out the clothes) while I check in on email. I understand this might be asking too much, but they are 5 and almost 4. C'mon. During that time, I broke up two more fights.

--Helped the kids get dressed since they have obviously lost all ability to listen, follow direction and do for themselves. Beg for a shower. (Please do realize that it's still not even 9 a.m.)

--Tell the kids I am taking a shower. Kids tell me they are hungry (ahem, starving). It's 9:10.

--Snap at them. Explain I need to take shower before we go out. We will go out for a super fun morning. Mommy needs shower. Anna asks for cheese.

--Take shower and find them fighting over coloring books. Quick get dressed and dust on makeup. Throw necessary items in the car: water bottles, snacks, bug spray, sunscreen.

--CRAP! Where the hell are we going?

--Quick look up something close. Found close by colonial farm that is cheap--animals, costumes, old time fun--perfect!

--Get in car and drive the 15 minutes. Arrive and Alex is upset that there are only 2 other cars. "Is this really open? Is this really where we should be? How can this be right?"

--The only bathroom is a porta potty. Ask every child if they need to go. Make Anna try to go. No go. We start walking. Everyone asks questions. I read all the signs. We follow the map. We cross things off. Anna starts grabbing herself as if she has to pee. Ask if she needs to go. She swears up and down she does not. We walk some more. Alex whines that there's nothing here. We see geese, pigs, chickens, lady planting corn, lady cooking food in old time house. We spend 45 minutes walking. It was a cute place.

--Anna has to pee. We race back to the front where the only bathroom is. She freaks by the porta potty but goes.

--Decide lunch is next. We drive back near home to go to lunch. Kids are happy at their new favorite location. Walk in and kids start acting like animals racing around. I grab them and tell them to stay put next to me or we'll leave.

--The lady behind me asks if we've been to the pool. Anna is wet. She apparently peed in her shorts from the porta potty. Super. We wait to order. We're next.

--Alex squeals I have to pee right now! You'll have to wait. The lady takes SO long to total our order and asks a bunch of questions. "I have to pee right now!"

--We grab our number and drinks and dash to the bathroom. He goes and Anna decides to wash her hands. Great idea. They all wash hands, play with the water, throw water, dance around the bathroom, start fighting. (OMG, how is it only 11:30?)

--Sit both kids down for a "Come to Jesus" meeting. I tell them: We go sit down. Bottoms stay on the seat--yes, Anna's nice wet one. Don't pick it up. Don't crawl under the table. Just sit and eat. We can talk. We don't scream.

--As we walk out, the man with our food is roaming around looking for us. He's annoyed. (Bet not as much as I am!) We sit down to eat. Everyone makes pleasant conversation. Alex: Mommy, thank you so much for this delicious food. Anna: Mommy, we're happy to bought us lunch. Thank you. We're so happy to be eating here.

--Alex finishes first and gets up announcing it's time to go. Anna and I are still eating. Explain he has to wait and how about talking about our trip to the farm.

--We finish. We leave. I sigh. As we walk out, they race to the car and Alex cries because he loses.

Aren't outings fun?

Comments

[Jenifer]

Aw, you had quite the day, didn't you? I had to laugh at the race-to-the-car-and-cry-because-he-lost...this was a daily event here. I finally put a rotating schedule on the calendar of who is first, second and third at whatever we do that day...just to stop the insanity!!

[Emily Faulkner]

Reading your post made me feel exhausted! Why is it so hard to do every little thing?!

Since we're on the topic - I have a question. My bunch is now 21 months and 8 months. And while I finally thought I had outings down to a science, things have suddenly shifted and I am at a loss once again. My youngest is getting too heavy to comfortably Bjorn on outings (i.e. Target!) and my oldest is too young to trust in the main part of a cart. I went to Target yesterday (right before dinner time, in the rain - HUGE mistake to begin with). And i thought i would try the huge awkward multi-child cart. Well of course it turns out you can't put the baby in the regular cart seat, and he's too small for the big kid seat. So I had to put my toddler in the main part of a regular cart and it is a miracle we all left the store in one piece. So how the hell am I supposed to go to Target in this stage of bunching? I can use the stroller, but not if I need to get anything other than what will fit in the bottom basket or a shopping basket that I have to lug around while pushing the stroller. I am sure I'm not the first mom to have this problem - so what did you do?

[Linda]

Emily, that is a great question! Perhaps we need a whole post on carts. :-) When I HAD to do it, I put my youngest in the seat and the oldest in the back part with snacks. It was the only way to ensure he stayed put. However....for a very long time I avoided any places with carts until the older one was able to act better. Actually, I may have just avoided all stores for a while. I did the stroller for a long while and then I used to do big runs like Target with just one kid. Next post is about avoiding Target with your Bunch. ;-)

[Brenda]

I've become quite the pro at the "cart choo choo train". I put the 23 month old in the seat and the 4 month in his car seat in the main compartment. I push that cart with one hand and pull another behind me with my other hand. Sounds tricky, but after a few tries, I've got it down pat! Good luck!

[jenni]

oh, that post makes me tired.