One of the many challenges Baby Bunchers face is schedules. When you're new to the world of Baby Bunching, your days are consumed trying to get New Baby on any semblance of a schedule at all, let alone one that overlaps with Big Baby's. As your Bunch gets a little older, you have to tweak the schedule to accommodate preschool schedules and then tweak them again when Big Baby decides to drop the afternoon nap when their younger sib still needs one. Or maybe you're adding to your crew post-Bunch and you now have a New New Baby that doesn't have a prayer of getting on a schedule because your days are so consumed with the activities of your Big Bunch. No matter the stage, I've always felt that by virtue of cramming lots of babies into a short time frame, Baby Bunchers certainly face more scheduling challenges than those who space their children further apart.
I've always been more on the schedule-less end of the spectrum myself. With the exception of when I am pregnant (during which I force all children already living in my home to nap every day from 1 pm to 4 pm because I must nap during this timeframe to stay functional), we're a fly-by-the-seat-of-our-pants kind of family. We're constantly doing school, playdates and other activities with friends, neighbors, and classmates at all hours of the day. Provided no one is melting down due to sickness/teething/chronic lack of sleep, the "go with the flow" approach has always kind of worked for us. I always found it too hard to plan around people's sleep schedules, preferring instead to adjust sleep schedules around the plans. Of course, the flip side of that is that if we actually HAD consistent sleep schedules, it might be easier to plan around them.
Conversely, I have Baby Bunching friends that live and die by strict schedules, saying that it is critical in keeping their clan running smoothly (Linda is one such friend). Another friend, whose oldest child has always needed a good bit of sleep, says it's just not worth it to shuffle naps around - her crew gets so bent out of shape that it's easier just to stay home so they can all get the rest they need.
Most parenting books I've read seem to lean more toward the scheduled side of things. Which makes sense - kids thrive under consistency, it helps you make sure they're getting the right number of hours of sleep for their age, and it is easier to plan your day when you know roughly how sleeping/eating schedules are going to shake out. But after five years of parenting and always feeling like I should be getting my crew on a more consistent schedule, I'm officially throwing up my hands and giving up on schedules. My kids get the right number of hours of sleep, just not always at the same time of day. Sure, sometimes I wish our naps were more consistent so I could plan activities around them instead of vice versa. But I learned a long time ago that there's no controlling my kids (or their sleep schedules, apparently), so I guess I'll just embrace the chef's surprise that each day brings.
I had no idea anyone else out there existed that doesn't live by a strict schedule! Wish I'd know sooner, as we could have gotten together during all those times when other mommies' kids actually take scheduled naps. haha
Seriously, though, we've always been a "fly by the seat of our pants" household too. Sometimes I wish we had more of a routine, but most of the time I like the fact that my kids are so flexible and easygoing about things. I had a friend whose kid would actually start freaking out around 2:02 if she wasn't at home for her nap exactly at 2pm. I can't even imagine.
Posted by: Alecia | Apr 21, 2009 at 04:25 PM
Count me in as someone who is not into schedules. It is very hard to be spontaneous with a baby bunch, but I prefer that to being tied to a schedule as it just gets to feeling so confining to me to be on a schedule. My kids to just great with the way we do things too. Glad to hear I am not alone with this perspective!
Posted by: Susan Smock | Apr 21, 2009 at 05:40 PM