Mom Blog and Baby Blog | Baby Bunching

baby bunching bests

We hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving this week. Both Cara and I enjoyed going away for a few days with friends (Cara) and family (Linda). Here are a few of our favorites for Baby Bunching bests. We have some new blogs on the list this week. We will be posting the "spread the word" post later this week. Thanks to everyone for linking to Baby Bunching.

Jenn over at Adventures in Momland had a very productive 45 minutes, and I'm amazed all all she was able to accomplish during that time.

Boom over at A Mom on the Verge while getting her house ready for Christmas decorations decided to take down her son's crib...the crib that's been a fixture for five years. She's just a bit emotional about the change. And I don't blame her. For us Baby Bunchers, we never really have a gap where the bed isn't being used.

Mary Beth over at Four Silly Sisters is the ultimate Baby Buncher with a set of triplets only 17 months after her first. She writes a very nice post about getting out the winter coats for all four of her girls.

Susan over at One Year Apart writes about the difference in taking her two girls to the library last year the day before Thanksgiving and this year. What a difference a year makes, huh? More over, I'm impressed Susan can take her kids to the library. It just goes to show you what a really nice librarian can do for your kids.

Ellyn over at Profoundly Seth has a great gadget recommendation--a little handheld timer that keeps track of how long it's been since you fed, diapered or put your baby down for a nap. Hence the name Itzbeen.

the love/hate relationship of twiblings

I love having twiblings (siblings close enough to almost be twins), really I do. I buy boots, winter coats, Halloween costumes in neutral colors/themes so that my younger one can re-wear it the very next year. I love that the kids play together with the same toys. I love that they are teaching each other to read and write at the same time. Seriously. But sometimes twiblings can be even a bit too much for even my own kids to love all the time.

Sibling rivalry is a part of everything everyday at our house. I can’t even imagine how people with four and five kids deal with this. And when I say sibling rivalry, I don’t always mean fighting. Everything is always a negotiation about what someone else has and what someone else doesn’t have, who gets to do what, what game we’re going to play, what puzzle we’ll do, what song we’ll listen to in the car or who gets out of the car first. Everything is give and take and it’s all day long. Since they’re both as about as smart as the other, there’s not much faking the negotiation process anymore….my kids are not fools!

So when they do decide to play together, which is really all the time unless one of them isn’t home, they are still in constant negotiation. Eventually they fall into a pattern of playing nicely for a while, but then of course it’s all over. I can’t help but wonder why they don’t play separately. They both seem to insist on being together.  Don't they get bored with each other sometimes and the constant negotiating?

When your kids are three years apart, you have some nice cushion there for what siblings want to play. Mine are like two peas in a pod. They play cars, dolls, tea party, blocks, Legos and pirates together. There is a little that they don’t do together. And it’s not that they don’t like each other because they do.

It usually goes something like this:

• Kids happily playing together. Mom is relieved—yet again—that Baby Bunching has paid off.

• Mom goes about doing her chores.

• Kids start to argue. Mom listens in knowing it’s only moments away before the fighting starts. And it does. (Yelling, screaming, hitting, door slamming to follow) Sometimes mom can get it before it escalates.

• Kids get in trouble and go into time out.

• Kids don’t want to be in time out apart; they want to be together. Mom hears whispers and footsteps as they play musical rooms and become best friends again while they’re supposed to be in time out.

• And the cycle starts all over again.

I imagine that all siblings have this kind of relationship. But my brother and I were three years apart, and I don’t really remember wanting to be with him quite as much as my kids want to be with one another.

Do you really think they are best friends or just friends by convenience?

happy turkey day

We're off celebrating and sharing in the family love this blessed season. We hope you eat lots of turkey, stuffing and other calorie-ridden foods and then sit around enjoying football or just good conversation. Happy Thanksgiving!

moby wrap winner

Thanks to everyone for entering the Moby Wrap giveaway courtsey of La Stella Blu. We enjoyed reading all the babywearing stories and tips. The winner was chosen by random.org and the winner is Alison Barjaktarovich.

Also, a big thank you to everyone as today we hit 10,000 page hits today! Not too bad for only having the Website up since mid-August. Thanks to everyone for reading and commenting.

taking your bunch on the road - by car

Awhile back, we did a post on traveling by air with two under two.  For those of you who are getting ready to take your show on the road for the holidays, we thought we'd provide our tops tips for traveling by car as well.  With family scattered all over the country, I've dragged my Bunch all over the place by both air and car.  Believe it or not, I have come to the conclusion that if our destination is anything 10 hours or less of actually driving time (subtract peepee, eating, and hotel stops), it's actually easier to drive than fly.  Note I did not say EASY, just easier.  Here are my top five trips for traveling by car:

• Get a portable DVD player.
• Get a portable DVD player.
• Seriously, did you get that portable DVD player yet?
• Install/connect the portable DVD player before you leave the driveway.
• Don't forget to pack the DVD's.

And honestly, I am not normally a huge TV person.  My kids are limited to 1 hour, if that, per day and some days they don't watch anything at all.  But they make up for it on long car trips, bringing their annual daily average to 1 hour per day.

I do have a few other tips as well:

• Pack lots of healthy snacks and a cooler of drinks.  This is key.  Recently I've come to the conclusion that most restaurants featuring drive-thru's are not only bad for your body, but taste sickening.  After three straight meals at McDonald's in a row, you will be craving something with nutritional value.  Before you leave, pack a snack bag with healthy foods such as PB&J sandwiches, fruit, pretzels, animal crackers, granola/breakfast bars, etc.  Throw some waters and maybe a few juice boxes in the cooler, along with some yogurts and a few cheese sticks.  This way you won't have to make a million stops for food, which is both expensive and time consuming.  Have snacks on hand as well as something a little heavier that can pass as a light meal for your child in case you happen to be in the middle of nowhere when your little ones are ready for a meal.  
• Stop frequently.  Yeah, yeah, I know this is annoying - especially to guys, who pride themselves on being able to drive coast to coast, stopping only long enough to fill up the gas tank.  But it is a sanity saver for Baby Bunchers.  So what if a 4 hour drive takes 7 hours?  Your life is crazy whether you're at home, on the road, or at your in-laws for Thanksgiving, so what's your hurry about getting to the other end?  Where to stop, you ask?  Look for fast food restaurants with playgrounds if your kids are old enough.  If not and the weather permits, look for little local parks/playgrounds where you can spread a blanket on the ground and let everyone stretch their legs.  Even better if you can stop at a destination.  We once took a 2 hour detour at DinoLand on a drive to Indiana, but darned if my kids didn't blaze through DinoLand and then sack out in the car for three hours afterwards.  So we bought three hours of silence for only two hours of actual time!
• Plan your trip to avoid a hotel stop if you can.  This is a tricky one and you really have to take into account your family's personality on this.  One thing about babies is that they travel with tons and tons of crap.  We found that we lost so much time stopping at hotels - by the time we unpacked and set up the PackNPlay, the suitcases, the toys, the snacks, etc. it was taking us half a day to get checked into/out of a hotel.  It was costing us more time than it was worth.  And don't even get me started on the fact that no one in my Bunch (including me) can sleep when we are all in the same room.  If you do decide to go this route, at least pack one change of clothes for everyone in a small overnight bag so you don't have to unload every suitcase.  We have many friends who address this problem by leaving after dinner or right before bedtime and drive straight through the night so their kids sleep for most of the trip.  This never worked for us because we were exhausted on the other end and there wasn't ever any time to catch up on the missed sleep.  So our solution (after trying both the hotel and driving through the night) is to leave at the crack of dawn and drive all day, getting to our destination late at night, but at least at a final destination.  Yes, this involves listening to more whining because our kids were so cranked up they rarely went back to sleep when we carried them to the car half-awake in the morning, but at least we avoided some of the other problems mentioned above.  Try it all three ways and you will learn what works best for you.  And let us know if you have other methods that work...
• Pack a few small, noiseless toys with NOT a million pieces.  This seems intuitive, but we just wanted to be sure you know.  Books are great.  Puzzles are not.  Etch-A-Sketches are great.  Anything that talks with an electronic voice is not.  Pack a few CDs with children's music that you can stand.  As a general rule, before you pack a toy, picture in your head how you are going to A) fit it in the car B) listen to it for 13 hours and C) keep up with it on the other end.  Use this as your litmus test.
• Pack an emergency clean up kit.  Someone will barf and someone will have a diaper blowout.  At the very least, someone will spill their drink.  Be sure you're prepared for all situations by packing a kit with paper towels, garbage bags, hand sanitizer, diapers/wipes/extra Pull Ups and training pants in sizes for all kids, and an easily accessible change of clothes for all family members, including yourself. Linda recommends keeping an extra potty in the trunk for just-in-case situations as well. Sometimes it's easier to pull over to pee than find a gas station, especially if your kids are prone to accidents.
• Don't forget pillows/blankets/loveys.  At some point, everyone will get sick of whining and fall asleep.  Anything you can do to facilitate a comfortable rest for a child who is sleeping sitting up with his head drooping forward is great.

Let us know if you've got other time-tested tricks.  Happy Thanksgiving and Happy Trails!

surviving the holidays with two under two

By Super Ninja Mommy

Well, folks, its almost Thanksgiving, and if you're anything like me, you're thinking, where did the time go? Wasn't it summer, like, yesterday? Yeah, it was just yesterday. Freaks me out too.

When the holidays come around, it's easy to get caught up in decorating and cooking and shopping, and at the end of the day, we fall into bed and realize we didn't spend nearly as much quality time with our children as we would have liked. But how do you incorporate two babies or toddlers into the busy-ness of the season?

It's really quite easy to spend time with your little ones and still get everything done. (Actually, it's far easier said than done, but if you can go grocery shopping or to the pediatrician with your bunch, you can pretty much do anything.) You just need a pinch of creativity, a peck of patience, and a bushel of time, and yes, you can get it all done, while (mostly) maintaining your sanity.

Even if you aren't hosting any holiday parties, you will probably be coerced into bringing a dish to pass for Thanksgiving. This is harder than a summer get-together, because in the summer, you can bring a watermelon and instantly be the hit of the  party. Thanksgiving proves a bit tougher. You are tempted to bring something from the local deli, and this is a great idea. Just put the salad or whatever in a nice dish from home and no one will be the wiser. I promise. They will probably compliment you on how great the green bean casserole is this year, and you can just smile and say, "Yeah, it took me all day." It's not a lie - it probably really did take you all day to get everyone dressed and in the car, and then haul them out of the car at the market, and then keep track of them while you shop, and then get everyone back in the car, and then into the house, along with a few bags of groceries. Go ahead, tell everyone you worked all day on that store bought item, because its probably harder to do than just making it at home.

Maybe you want to make a homemade yummy to bring to dinner, or maybe you snapped in the middle of the night and woke up thinking, 'I'll host Thanksgiving! Weee!' Now you have to cook and keep the kids occupied. For a toddler over the age of twelve months, uncooked lasagna noodles and a big pot and spoon are all you need. Your child will happily break the noodles in pieces and stir them in the pot, and then dump them all out and use the pot for a drum. (You can use spaghetti noodles, but I don't recommend it, because spaghetti noodles can be used as weapons. Trust me.)

Also, it is perfectly acceptable to plunk your children in front of the television while you prepare food. Don't let anyone tell you differently, either - the anti-television people have probably never had babies close in age. Just make sure they're watching something wholesome - The Brady Bunch, yes. The Osbornes, no, unless your babies are still very young and don't know what they're watching. The Brady Bunch is a good option because, come on, who wouldn't want Alice to take care of their kids? Alice can come watch my brood whenever she wants, so long as she doesn't start any funny business with Sam the Butcher on my couch.
But I digress.

Another way to keep the kids busy while you cook for the holidays is to have them help you. If you go this route, you are a very brave mother and deserve an award. Maybe two. Toddlers love to help cook and clean. They are about as good at helping as a drunk money, and Lord forgive you if you don't realize this until halfway through, because you can't just get them to walk away mid-stir. Taking a toddler away from pumpkin pie batter will almost always result in a huge tantrum, unless you drug the child, which is certainly not recommended. Just remember: if you invite the kids to help, you are in it for the long haul, and you are also probably the greatest mom ever.

Even something as simple as decorating for the holidays is severely cramped with a couple of kids in tow. When the children are older - say, school age - decorating for the holidays becomes really fun, because by this time they are actually good at helping, and will remember all the fun they had and maybe pass the tradition on to their own children. When the kids are little though, you may be tempted to just forgo the decorating in favor of something a bit more gratifying, like sleep. If you do decide to put up wreaths and such, just remember to keep everything at least four feet off the floor. Six feet is ideal, especially if you have a climber. You would be amazed at the havoc a one year old child and a Playskool plastic chair can wreak on a Christmas tree. Obviously, real candles are totally out of the question, as well as anything made of glass. It is unbelievably difficult to extract shards of blown glass ornaments from skin, especially the skin on the bottom of Dad's feet, so try not to decorate with any of those.

As crazy as the holidays can be, there is nothing so special as seeing your child's eyes light up on Christmas morning. Even the youngest baby will sit on your lap, mesmerized by lights and colors, while children over a year of age will squeal with delight, or just sit in awe at the miracle which has been presented to them. Because to a one or two year old, a brightly lit tree with colorful packages piled beneath it is indeed a miracle, falling just short of Mom deciding that ice cream would be a perfectly fine choice for breakfast.

Keep in mind that just three or four gifts is a pile to a small child. There is no need to compulsively buy every gift and gadget with that magical age range plastered on the front. I guarantee that if you buy your child the fanciest toy - you know, the one that lights up and sings and teaches the colors in seventeen languages - your child will find the box far more interesting. This is Universal Gift Truth Number One, and cannot be avoided. Your third or fourth child will probably find that fancy toy in the toybox, in like new condition, and love it far more than the child to whom it was originally gifted. This is Universal Gift Truth Number Two.

Above all, try to enjoy this holiday season. There will never be another one just like it. It might be your child's third Holiday, but it's probably the first one he or she will remember. If it's your child's first or second Holiday, make it special because you will remember. All you really need for a successful Holiday - be it Christmas, Hanukkah, or Kwanzaa - are your family, friends, and cheer. With these three things, you and your little twiblings will enjoy a season of merriness rivaled by no other.

Happy Holidays!

Super Ninja Mommy has four children, ages 7, 4, (nearly) 16 months, and (nearly) 3 months. She also has a husband, a morbidly obese chihuahua, and a cross-eyed cat. She blogs at http://2undertoo.blogspot.com.

baby bunching bests

Here's this week's Baby Bunching Bests. We're still taking comments for the Moby Wrap giveaway which ends on Tuesday and there's time to get in on the "spread the word."

Mara over at The Mother of All Trips has a great list with the top five reasons to travel with your kids. While she's not officially a Baby Buncher, we thought the information was still worth sharing. Linda was so inspired by this post that her family has actually decided to try a vacation next year...finally.

And on the travel note, Debbie over at Delicious Baby has a list of travel must haves for your holiday traveling adventures--including duct tape.

Kristen of Motherhood Uncensored is over at The Alpha Mom Guide to Everything with some tips on how to survive the first few weeks of motherhood with some sanity. She recently had her third baby so she's very experience on this topic.

Feener over at MommyVents talks about her kids asking for a new mommy. As kids get older, sometimes it's still difficult to find things for them to do that appease everyone...including mom.  

buying a stroller: 15-month old and baby on the way

We have two Baby Bunching moms who we have selected to let us help them pick out a double stroller. We will introduce each one in a separate post and take you through the buying process. Plus, check out our new double stroller guide.

Our first stroller buying Baby Buncher is Jessica from New Jersey. Here was the note we received:

I am currently in the market for a double stroller.  My son just turned one and we will be welcoming a daughter in February, making our kids only 15 months apart.  Right now we have a single Bob Revolution and a Maclaren Triumph.  We love both strollers for their obvious differences.  We plan on putting the Bob on Craigslist in the very near future.  Originally I was planning on going with the Phil & Ted but now I'm thinking maybe a Baby Jogger City Mini would be better. Or maybe there is something out there I'm not aware of.  My main concerns are that we do a lot of outdoor walking so all terrain tires would be great (Phil & Ted) but the side by side seating (Baby Jogger) may be better for the children?????  And it's nice that the Phil & Ted can go back to a single stroller.  Decisions, Decisions, Decisions.  Your help and guidance would be much appreciated.

Jessica’s requirements: Jessica and her family live in the “urban” suburbs of New Jersey. They do a lot of walking outside on trails and since her neighborhood doesn’t have sidewalks they are on the street a lot. She needs a stroller that will work for the trails, the mall, walking the dog, running and traveling.  She wants to find one stroller (“sort of like the triumph and revolution in one”) that can do it all since this is the last stroller they hope to purchase.

She has an SUV large enough to hold just about any stroller, but her storage options are an outdoor shed. She doesn’t want anything massive in size, but wants something comfortable for both kids.

Things to consider: The main thing here is the close spacing of Jessica’s soon-to-be ‘twiblings.’ A 15-month age difference, in terms of double strollers, means one important thing: long lifespan. If your kids are closer to two years apart, the stroller requirement changes—mom can wear a sling for a few months and by the time baby’s done in carrier, the oldest one is at a different “stroller development stage.” Kids this close together will both be in the stroller longer. So consider that when making your investment.

Her budget: $400

Our initial feedback: Her current thoughts on a Phil & Ted and City Mini are great places to start. These are within your price range and serve multiple purposes. A side-by-side or a tandem is really a personal preference.  Linda’s kids could never sit happily next to each other without someone touching or leaning on the other one. Cara’s kids seemed to be more tame and happier as a side-by-side duo. So a lot may depend on your kids. We don’t think one is better for the kids than the other.

moby wrap giveaway

In honor of the fact that it is International Babywearing Week and the recent brouhaha caused by the Motrin babywearing ad, we're giving away a Moby Wrap, courtesy of La Stella Blu.

If you've never tried the Moby, you've got to. It's like magic. As I said in an earlier post on Moby vs. Bjorn, it does take a few minutes to get into. If you're like me and you're not good an envisioning how things work or assembling stuff, it will be a challenge for you to get it "just right." Please do not practice putting it on while your baby is freaking out waiting for you to figure it out.

But boy, oh boy, once you've got it on, your little one will just snuggle right up and either a) promptly sack out or b) enjoy the view (whether it's of the outside world or your boobs, depending on which way you put the carrier on). It's made of soft, stretchy fabric so the best part is that you won't need any Motrin!  It's kind to mom's back and soft and comfy for baby. Mine was a baby shower gift and I thank the girls who gave it to me daily.

Post a comment on whether babywearing works or doesn't work for you and why by Tuesday 11/25 to enter the random drawing to win your own!

strollers: maclaren, city mini, phil & ted

Continued from yesterday . . .

After my RightStart visit this weekend, I learned a little more about strollers, but mainly I just got to run them through the store. In yesterday's post, I talked about the Joovy Caboose and BabyTrend Sit N' Stand, but I also wanted to find out the difference in the two twin Maclaren strollers: The Triumph and the Techno.

When I wandered over to the Maclaren area, the saleslady wanted to point out that these strollers were really more for twins than kids close in age. I both agree and disagree. I discovered with my kids there was a window where using the side-by-side for my kids was difficult due to temperament and size differences. Temperament is temperament and you can’t do much about kids leaning to one side or conking each other on the head. Especially when they are too small to really get it. But that affects twins as well. The size difference can be a bit offsetting—literally. There was a time when the difference in weight was almost too much for me to maneuver the stroller. Anna weighed so much less than her brother that I had trouble steering my side-by-side around. So the closer in age, probably the better these strollers would work for you.

The difference between the two is simple. The Maclaren Twin Techno has a few more bells and whistles, 5 more pounds of weight and feet extensions to help make a newborn comfortable. The price difference between the Techno and the Triumph is great so I’d probably go with the cheaper one.

Now on to the fun strollers. While browsing, I brushed passed the new City Mini from Baby Jogger. I really had to catch my breath. This one was awesome! Someone had mentioned this in our previous double stroller dialogue, but it really was cool. Although the saleslady was unfamiliar with it beyond how to fold it up. It’s light and easy to maneuver. Yes, I was running it through the store. It folds like a dream. One hand and one movement. You’re done. The best part is it has one long bar on the back, with is so nice when you have a double stroller. I always hated the umbrella stroller handles and this makes it easy to drive. It would be so perfect for…well…the city, the mall, traveling and even some well-paved trails. Really loved this stroller.

Then I had to walk over and give the Phil & Ted a once over. The lady looked at me and smiled. "This is the one I try to get people to consider when they have kids close in age." I know lady, my biggest regret. The price tag at RightStart was a bit high. I have seen them as low as $350 minus the doubles kit. The newer ones boast a lighter weight (and higher price) and a second seat you don't have to take off when you pull out of the car. But the lady showed me how and it wasn't that complicated.

She tried to explain the weight distribution. I guess on the toddler seat the weight only goes up to 33 pounds, but the front is 55 pounds. So you might have to play a bit of musical stroller seats a couple of times with your kids. But overall, when I took this stroller on a test drive through the store it drove like a dream. Was that because kids weren't present and I wasn't breaking up fights or leanings? I think there may bee a reason you don't often find this stroller on Craigslist. It's in an investment people have around for a while.