Really the question for this should be: Do you want your toddler wandering around the house while you're messing with a baby and do you want a safe place to put him when you're attending to the little one?
There are amazing toddlers who will obey you at 18 months and stay in their rooms like little angels. (I only know one mom with a child like this.) There are other ways to ensure your older child is safe from harm while you change a diaper. But don't pass up the crib if you don't need to.
When I found out I was pregnant with my second, I realized no way would my first be ready for a bed--he would be 16 months when she was born. I bought a crib second hand (actually I think it was third hand) from another Baby Bunching mom who had just moved her oldest to a big boy bed. It was a smaller crib that would work up until my daughter was only about a year. Sure enough when my son turned two, he wanted a big bed and she was ready to move up to his crib. We sold the crib again to yet another Baby Bunching mom doing the same thing.
The crib serves as more than a bed. To oust your oldest before he's ready (or you're ready) can unleash all kinds of other issues you may not be ready for such as room destruction and disappearing naps. The latter is crucial. You want to keep those naps as long as possible.
A few things to keep in mind:
1. The size of your house. If you live in a Manhattan apartment, a second crib may be a space issue and your oldest may have to move to something else or the baby will need to be the Pack n' Play longer than you anticipated. They can last in there for quite a long time, surprisingly.
2. Budget. You may not have money for a second crib. If you think you need one, you'd be surprised how many other moms would gladly free up their attic/basement while you borrow one for a bit. I have one sitting here if someone needs one.
3. Your child's temperament. If you kid seems ready for a bed and she's a well-behaved 22 months old, I'd say go for it. If you have a rambunctious 17-month old that likes to ransack his room, maybe not quite yet.
4. Spacing. If your kids are closer to 13 months apart, clearly you'll need place to put your new baby. If your kids are closer to the 24-month mark, you could fudge it if you need to.
But our recommendation: Keep the crib as long as possible.
My first two children are 20 months apart. We bumped our daughter out of the crib to a mattresss on the floor when she was 17 months old. We baby-gated the door so we could still easily hear her and contain her in her room. She often moved to the floor by the gate to be as close to up and feel asleep on the floor. We just moved her to her bed each night. Eventually she stayed put in the bed. Baby #2 was bumped out of the crib to a bed when he was 22 months and stayed put from day one. We were firm and consistent the first week and from there - no looking back.
Posted by: Beth | Aug 09, 2008 at 08:51 PM
My children are 19.5 months apart and we opted for a 2nd crib when #2 was born. My daughter was sleeping so well in her crib and we didn't want to mess with a good thing! It worked out well. We bought an inexpensive crib for #2. We ended up moving our daughter to a bed when she was 2.5yo. A good tip is to try to borrow a 2nd crib...if you have friends who are not using their crib for an extended time.
Posted by: Carri | Aug 09, 2008 at 09:16 PM
Thanks so much for the site-
Although I am not having/cannot have any more -
I'm passing on your link to my brother and his wife ;)
Posted by: BananaBlueberry | Aug 09, 2008 at 09:46 PM
Our two oldest boys are 19 months apart. When #2 came along, we left #1 in the crib as long as possible. #2 did just fine first in the cradle in our room, then in the pack and play in his own room until #1 was ready to move to a mattress on the floor. We figured if he fell out of bed it wouldn't be very far!
Posted by: Andrea | Aug 11, 2008 at 09:15 AM
My babes are 13 months apart. I did not want to buy a second crib. An easy, cheap solution is a pack n play! My newborn sleep in the bassient part for several months. And when she was ready to move into the crib, her older brother was ready for a big boy bed.
A pack n play is a super solution for those who don't want the expense or the space-taking second crib.
Posted by: miamommy | Aug 11, 2008 at 12:00 PM
I kept my oldest in the crib until she outgrew it by height or weight (which happened when she turned 2). But since they are 17 months apart I had to find another crib, and through a trade I received a friend's portable crib. Yay! But a porta-crib just doesn't cut it for a baby as it gets bigger. Add to that I had #3 only 15 months after #2.
So I am the proud owner of 1 toddler bed, 2 full size cribs, 1 porta-crib, & 2 pack n plays (because you have to have something for trips). =]
Posted by: Kira =] | Aug 12, 2008 at 02:09 PM
My two youngest are 18 months apart, and we had the new baby in our room for the first ~3 months in a co-sleeper next to the bed. We only have 3 bedrooms, so baby was with us, toddler had a crib in her own room, and our older son had his own room with bunk beds (but slept on the bottom). We knew that two would eventually have to room together, but I could NOT for the life of me figure out how to put the toddler with the baby. (She likes to sing and talk to herself for a while before going to sleep.) We switched her for a few days into the bottom bunk, and when that seemed non-eventful (amazingly!), we bumped the baby to the other crib-room, and YEAH, we had our bedroom back! It's worked just fine since then-- naptime and bedtime, and she's only gotten out of bed once. We have a lot of challenges in our family, so I'm thankful this wasn't one of them! :)
Posted by: morninglightmama | Aug 13, 2008 at 09:55 PM
Yes, yes, yes to the pack-n-play! My youngest slept in it for several months as well. It was great because it could be moved to anywhere in the house. Then, like the former commenter said, she moved into the crib just as the oldest moved into a big girl bed.
Honestly, if I'd known I never really would have gotten a crib in the first place. Just a really really good pack-n-play. My kids learned to climb out of their crib so early that having it vs. the pack-n-play at that age wouldn't have made a difference anyway. More importantly was the big girl bed with a childproofed room and a really good baby gate at the door to their room.
Posted by: Alecia | Aug 21, 2008 at 04:42 PM
I don't have #2 yet (2 more months) but let me shamelessly plug the cribs we got: They are Mini Cribs by Da Vinci (we got the Emily style, there is also another one but I forgot the name of it. Annabelle or Annette or something.)
They are smaller than regular cribs (you have to buy portable crib bedding) and will both fit into the same room without it being crowded.
They don't have a drop side. They are not as tall as a regular crib, and the mattress height is adjustable, so it's not too tough to get the baby in there. I'm 5'1" and with the front "roll" bar off the emily crib, I can bend in half over the edge of the crib. My husband is 6'4" and has a bad back. We worried that he'd have trouble putting the baby in at the lowest setting, but it's not too low for him.
They come in lots of finishes so it's easy to match them to other furniture. You can actually buy them on Amazon or other online stores and you can find them on sale, or with free shipping, all the time. (At the time of this post, Diapers.com has them for $200 and free shipping.)
They are light but sturdy, they fit through doorways and down hallways without being disassembled, and best of all? They convert into a twin bed when you're done using them as a crib. (Who wants to get a regular size crib that converts into a full size bed... what toddler/preschooler needs a full size bed?!)
And I swear, nobody paid me anything to write this. They're just THAT cool.
Posted by: Della | Jul 16, 2009 at 12:31 AM
Me too actually. I would actually rock this stuff in a room lol.
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