Baby Bunching

baby bunching Q/A: the perfect baby bunching ride

This question is from Baby Buncher Melissa.

Q:  We'll be in the market for a mini-van soon! I never thought I'd want one but have been using one overseas for the past 2 years and realize I can't live without all the room! We've got 2 toddlers and a dog. I'm a little out of touch with the new features on vans...have seen some commercials where you can store stuff ...in the floor, built-in DVD players behind the front headrests, etc. Which models do you like and why?

A: Minivans are popular with Baby Bunchers for many reasons and once you get inside you'll see why. Lots of options. Lots of room. Bonus is getting everyone inside and THEN getting everyone strapped in. Heck, isn't that what the original VW bus was for? Linda's parent's (back in the early 80s) even had a pop-up table. (Pre-car seats/booster, of course.)

Today there are many choices to make when choosing a minivan for your Bunch. It's no secret that the top two out there are the Honda Odyssey and Toyota Sienna (note, the Sienna is not included in Toyota's recent recall related to faulty accelerators). Car & Driver Magazine continually rates the Odyssey, especially, as one of the top ones each year because it outperforms the competition and is fun to drive, which is a big bonus for dads. Cara and Linda have both owned (or currently own) some kind of Honda vehicle and can vouch for all things Honda!

While Linda refuses to ever own a minivan (though she secretly covets the extra room her friends have over her RAV-4), Cara reluctantly delved into the world of minivans  a few years ago by purchasing a Hyundai Entourage. Once the ugly stepchild of Asian automakers, Hyundai has significantly increased in both safety ratings and reliability in recent years. It was the price tag (a full 10K lower than a comparable, fully loaded Sienna) and extended warranty that lured Cara to the Entourage in the first place and she has never looked back.

So what to consider when buying a van?

Naturally, safety-related features (air bags, tire pressure warning systems, rear/sensors and backup cameras, etc.) are of concern, so do your Consumer Reports homework.

Practical features we consider pretty important:

-Seating. Middle and rear seating come in various bench/captain configurations, but only the Odyssey and Sienna have eight-passenger seating options last time we checked.  So if you're locked in on that extra seat, your options are a little more limited off the bat.  Also, some models feature reconfigurable 2nd row seats, so if you're wanting to maximize seating, ask about that.

-Fold-flat third row seat. Even though most Bunchers max out their minivans with car seats, it's still handy to have the third row for cargo space for when you've got Dad at home to watch your Bunch so you can remove a car seat and run out and buy that second crib.

-Automatic doors/rear lift gate - So, so handy to be able to open/close all doors with a click of your remote. Careful, though - Cara's Entourage is not as sensitive to sensing tiny bodies obstructing the door as she wishes it was, so watch your kids around the doors at all times.

-In floor storage - Dodge Caravan, Chrysler Town & Country, and the Odyssey have it.  Who among us isn't constantly searching for more ways to contain our crap?

And the fluff:

-Cup holders.  Cara has 3 drinks going at all times (water, coffee, and usually a Diet Coke) plus drinks for all of her Bunch. Excessive number of cup holders = Cara's dream vehicle.

-DVD/Entertainment System - Cara (and Linda) opted expressly AGAINST this so she didn't have to fight that battle every morning on the way to school, but some moms consider it a plus.

-Built-in sunshades - We hear they've been in luxury cars for years (not that we would know anything about that) and they're migrating over to minivans.  Big improvement over our cheapy BabiesRUs ones that break all the time!

-Navigation system - Yeah, many of us have it on our cell phones now.  But it's just easier to have it on a screen right in front of you. 

We thought we'd pass along this ConsumerSearch site with a few things to consider as well. Share any other tips/features you love that we missed!

Stay tuned next Wednesday for a question on moving kids in with each other.

baby buncher Q/A: life after the infant seat

Q: Currently, I have 1 toddler who is 19 months and another child who is 4 months. We've all just mastered our little dance our loading the kids in the car. One goes in the big boy car seat while the other... one goes via infant car seat into a base. We've also figured out how to maneuver the grocery store with one sitting up in front and the other one in the cart in the car seat.

What happens to my life when littlest one gets too big to fit into the car seat and I have to carry both. Right now my toddler books it every time his sneaks hit the floor. What happens when that both get to walking. How to you get the older one to stay right next to you?

A: When my first child started to near the weight limit on his infant bucket seat, I immediately felt the need to bump him up to a more comfortable ride. Enter the convertible car seat. But my poor second child was literally busting out of her infant seat before I was ready to give in and move her out. Why? Because infant seat meant she was transferable from car to home, home to car, car to shopping cart, etc. Once she was out the seat, I would be left with two kids to contend with in parking lots or even in my own foyer.

My youngest was just about nine months old when I realized the infant seat was just WAY too small for her physique. Of course, she outgrew that bucket seat right about the time that Alex started a preschool where I had to walk him in (up a snowy hill) everyday. Super convenient. Moving her up to the convertible car seat meant I had to look into buying another one since my oldest was only two at the time. 

It can be very difficult to deal with two toddlers who are loose and on the prowl and possibly darting into traffic.

The answer to your question is you become creative and quick on your feet. A few things to note and then I hope other Baby Bunchers will chime in:

--Drive thrus can be your best friend. I didn't have anything I could drive through, but you'd be amazed how far I would drive just for that convenience.

--Parking close to the store or a cart corral is critical. I would often drive around and wait so I could be right next to all the carts so I could literally lift one from point A to point B without having to go very far.

--Invest in a carrier. Ergo holds kids up to a decent weight. Have your littlest one get adjusted to life in this sooner rather than later. This will ensure at least one is strapped to you past the infant stage.

--Make sure you have a double stroller. Pull it out of the car and load them both up one at a time. If your oldest is a darter into traffic then load him in first and strap him in. Then put the little one in once you know he's safely in his seat.

--Grocery store visits will change. You will have one up front still and the second may have to ride in the Ergo on your back or sit in the cart part...not ideal, but you do what you have to. I have seen moms pushing two carts around with both kids. If you are coordinated enough for that, go for it!

--You may be able to play games with them as they get older. One mom I knew put a sticker on her car and when she was messing with the youngest told her oldest to touch his hand to the sticker. This may work for some kids so try it. (I could hear mine laughing at my hysterically....hold the sticker? Are you crazy?!) Another mom calls the parking medians "islands" and if you walk in the parking lot/street it's considered shark infested water. So they run from place to place. This worked well when my kids were 3.

Please let us know what suggestions you have for life after the infant seat.

snack & play tray giveaway: making your car trips just a little bit more fun

As we wrap up car week, we have noted that the car and car seats seem to be a necessary evil for many people. While it's so important to be safe when getting to and from point A and point B, it's also important for everyone to stay sane. There are tons of great car accessories on the market to keep babies, toddlers and preschoolers occupied. Between the two of us, we've run through them all at one point or another--snack traps, dangle toys, books, mirrors, etc. But when we saw this accessory--the Snack & Play Travel Tray--featured at Daily Candy a few months back, we were sure this was a winning Baby Bunching product.

So what is so fabulous about this product?

1) We love the whole concept of a collapsible tray which you can pack for an airplane journey, car ride or shove in the basket of your stroller. It's made of foam so it's light to take and store.

2) We love the idea of a tray. Linda used to profess that a tray attached to the stroller would have kept her kid so much happier (since her stroller didn't have one). This would have been a perfect add-on. The Snack & Play is perfect for toddlers who want to keep snacks in front of them, arrange them in fun lines and circles and eventually drop them on the ground. Hey, we're no fools. As kids get older, it's great for coloring, reading, mini games (as kids get older) or keeping sippy cups/lovies from rolling onto the floor.

3) It's adjustable. This is awesome because it will fit most car seats or strollers in some way. We love this for the airplane because if you've traveled with a kid and a carseat you know that no tray table is coming down with most of the car seats nowadays. It's a tight squeeze any way you look at it.

4) You can hose it down. Every product Baby Bunching endorses must be easy to wash and/or hose down. This one says to wipe down with damp cloth, but I'm guessing hosing it down would work, too, since glued on Goldfish were pretty much standard during the first two years.

So you love this product now, too? Really, how can you not?

We have one to giveaway to a lucky winner. Please go check out their website, and 1) leave a message here about why you need this wonderful car accessory for your Bunch. If you really super love it, we will add your name in an extra time if you 2) either go tweet this giveaway or post to your wall on Facebook (please come back and tell us if you posted to Facebook as we have no way of tracking that!). So you have double the chances to win. Please, please, please make sure you leave a way for us to contact you here (email address). You can't win if we can't contact you.

Congratulations to Marla for being our winner!

driving under the influence (of my bunch)

A recently released study found that drivers who are texting are 23 more times more likely to crash than the undistracted driver.  It is also common knowledge that in addition to driving under the influence of drugs and alcohol, activities such as talking on a cell phone, eating, reading, putting on makeup,etc. while driving can also all increase our chances of having an accident. 

As an addled mother of three children age five and under, I can honestly say that more than any of the aforementioned activities, my driving is poorly influenced by the following:

• Thinking While Driving
• Parenting While Driving

Today on the way to a pool play date, I was preoccupied with thoughts of the start of school next week, the neighborhood playgroup I am trying to start for my youngest, the violin lessons I wanted to look into for my oldest, the birthday present I need to mail for my sister, and the blog post I needed to come up with to wrap up Car Week on Baby Bunching.  Damned if I didn't shoot right past the turn for the pool and not even realize it until I was several miles down the road.  As I made the U-Turn and cursed the fact that we were already 45 minutes late to the play date, I wondered what else I had missed as I was rocketing down the road dreaming of my to-do list.  My eyes were glued to the road ahead of me, but my mind was definitely wandering down a different one. Unfortunately, there's not much I can do to stop myself from thinking hard.  But my kids can.

If I'm not deep in thought in the car, it's because I'm playing deejay and fielding music requests, turning the A/C up or down to maximize the comfort of my complaining passengers, rolling windows down, doling out snacks, tossing water bottles to the back of the van, dangling toys in front of a crying baby, or refereeing fights between two fighting preschoolers.  To make it worse, due to my significant hearing loss I can't hear any child in the third row of my van so I can frequently be found lip-reading in the rear view mirror while driving, trying to decipher whatever Urgent Need is at hand.  I often feel that it would be safer to drive around guzzling a beer.

Before I had kids, I used to think that those people driving around with "Baby on Board" signs were absolute lame-ass dorks.  Now I realize that those signs are an SOS of sorts - as in, "Do yourself a favor and please stay the hell out of my way because there's a time bomb on board that that could detonate at any second and I have no control over any aspect of my life, least of all my driving."

As a Baby Buncher, I'm thinking there is an opportunity for us to lobby our state legislatures to designate us as emergency vehicles so we can be authorized to sport sirens.  We owe it to the rest of the world to let them know we're coming so they can clear a wide berth. 

car organization: what every buncher needs in the car

As I sat through the OfficeMax Blogcast today with Peter Walsh, I realized a few things about organization--a key point, which is to have everything you need within reach AND organize everything first then buy containers to fit them. And while he was mainly talking about organizing paperwork, I think you can apply some the lessons learned to organizing your car.

Unless you live in a major city, you probably spend a good deal of time in your car everyday. Just like you keep your home and office organized and equipped and somewhat streamlined, you also need to be smart about what's in your car beyond just car seats and toys.

What You Should Store in Your Car:

1) Every mom needs a "just in case" bag of some kind. It doesn't have to be an actual bag, but the contents need to be there. What's in it will change as your kids grow so make sure from time-to-time that you update it with the correct size diapers and clothes. In your car, you need an extra outfit (for each kid and preferably even you) and extra diapers/underwear. This will save you from having to carry it around in your diaper bag since you just have to make it back to the car to change.

2) Wipes. Even now with my kids at 4 and 5 we have wipes in the glove compartment for all kinds of fun things. Sometimes I even use them as entertainment and let them "wash" my windows to keep them quiet.

3) A towel. I ALWAYS have a towel in my car. I have used this for so many things including wiping the slides at the playground after the rain, cleaning up spills, changing pad, etc.

4) A few toys/books/crayons. Even if you don't want your car looking like a toy store, keep a few items (and rotate them out) to throw back at the kids for entertainment purposes. I like to keep these up front so they appear new now and then. Plus, they are great to have on hand for restaurant trips.

5) Music. We're big fans of kid music (most of the time). Rotate out the music so it's fresh for everyone.

6) Snacks. Even some raisin packs, juice boxes, crackers, etc. are great to have on hand in case people are STARVING at some point. (Isn't that all the time.) My husband fusses at me for this one, but I don't care.

7) Bags. Plastic bags are great for nasty diapers, wet clothes, or using as a liner for a potty. Just keep a big ball of them in the bag. They're great to have on hand. AND you can always use them at the grocery store for....groceries.

8) Potty. When my kids were potty training, we kept an extra potty in the back of the car for playground trips--sometimes Although as soon as you think your kid is potty trained you'll wish you had left the potty in the car. (Tip: Just leave it in the car.)

9) Jacket or sweater. I can't tell you how many times we get somewhere at some odd time of the year and someone is cold. Just keep one in your car. I promise you will be glad you have it. Nothing sucks more than having to go home because people are cold. (You might keep an umbrella in there for you, but kids don't care about getting wet.)

10) Mini first aid kit + more. Keep a few band aids and Neosporin around for incidentals. Vaseline has been a good on to have on hand for many things (diaper rash, chapped lips, boo boos, etc.) And in the summer sunscreen of some kind and bug spray.

11) Dixie cups and plastic spoons/fork. I know this sounds strange, but this is another one that doesn't take much. Just keep a few in there for sharing with friends or dividing out a bag of goldfish so kids don't have to share. Snack traps are great, but in a pinch bathroom dixie cups will get the job done for older kids. And a giant bag of plastic spoons/forks has been a lifesaver so many times. I don't know why, but it has.

12) Hand sanitizer. Really, need I say more?

13) Reading material for mom. There have been many times that I'm stuck in carpool line, kids are napping or we're waiting for the library to open. Throw a few catalogs or magazines for your own reading enjoyment just in case people are quiet in the back seat and give you a minute to relax.

Now that you have everything you need, how do you store it? There are all kinds of fun "car organizers" for these things. But really, you just need a few boxes of some kind. Ones you can hose down tend to be better. Keep the wipes, hand sanitizer, magazines, music, toys, snacks all within your reach. I keep the cups/spoons in my glove compartment. The rest can be thrown in the trunk. Keep the things in up front one container so you can move it when you need to and the rest in some kind of trunk container. I never leave stuff between my kids because they just hurl books at each other. But if your kids are better at that game, then keep the toys back with them.

I'm sure I'm missing something so please share with us what you keep in your car to help keep you organized. 

car seat: could'a, would'a, shoulda's

Like in most other aspects of Baby Bunching, hindsight is 20/20 when it comes to car seat purchases.  If we had a nickel for every time we thought "If I'd only known then what I know now", we'd have enough money for an entire warehouse of Britax Marathons and Bugaboo strollers.

In today's post we share our car seat lessons learned with you. Between the two of us, we have purchased 12 car seats over the years, a process that could've been significantly streamlined had we had the benefit of the wisdom we are about to share with you. 

We do issue the disclaimer that since our Bunches have pretty much settled into boosters and Cara's 1-year old caboose is using his brother's hand-me-downs, we are not completely up to speed on all the latest and greatest models.  As with strollers, it seems that car seat gear is constantly evolving, only we don't have quite the love affair with car seats that we do with strollers.  So we are counting on you, dear readers, to chime in about the newest seats on the market.  But we'd like to make a few key points:

• Linda would like to say that she loves all things Britax. She loves her Roundabout so much that she's been unable to part with it, despite the fact that she no longer has a child riding in it (note: she now reports that there is now a Roundabout 50, which goes up to 50 lbs).  Linda loves the design, the quality, the ease of installation and cleaning, the comfort level, the safety rating, all of it - Britax is the total package.  She maintains that it just makes all other car seats feel inferior.  The biggest drawback:  the price tag, natch.  She couldn't justify the cost of the Britax booster seat when it came time to move up. Turns out this may have been a good thing, since Cara's good friend Jen posted just today about how she's had it up to here with her Frontier and traded it in for a Graco Nautilus (speaking of seats that get rave reviews).
• Cara's big advice is that she wishes she had skipped the convertible car seat with the 40 lb limit and gone straight to the mega convertible that goes all the way to belt positioning booster (in her case, the Cosco Alpha Omega Elite).  The Elite goes to 100 lbs and would've rendered both her Evenflo Triumph (which she loves, by the way) and Graco High Back Turbo Booster obsolete.  If she had to do it all over again, she would've gone straight from the infant carrier to mega convertibles for everyone.
• Speaking of infant carriers, they are now recommending that babies stay rear facing a lot longer than they did when our Bunches were tiny.  Back in the day, just about everyone had a Graco Snug Ride (up to 22 lbs), but now Graco SnugRide 32 goes up to 32 lbs and the Chicco Key Fit 30 goes up to 30. Both allow you to keep your baby in rear facing infant seats longer and continue to realize the benefits of the super convenient SnapNGo type strollers - yay!
• Earlier this week, we posted about the dilemma of fitting 3 car seats across a single row.  We've researched it a little further and confirmed that word on the street is that the Sunshine Kids Radian is definitely the way to go.  This little underdog of car seats gets major props from Car & Caboodle for being not only narrow, but solid (built on a steel alloy frame), comfy, easy to install, foldable for travel, and usable from birth to 80 lbs in a 5 point harness (just not super plushly comfortable for tiny infants).

So there you have it, guys and gals.  Our down and dirty guide to what we wish we knew way back when - happy car seat shopping!

the car is my second home

(Note: Total stream of consciousness . . . beware)

The car makes me tired. Loading. Unloading. I swear the car is like my second home. I have a second of everything stashed away in there--wipes, clothes, underwear, bags, sunscreen, toys, books, even plastic spoons. I rarely clean out the car so it smells. My husband has tried to forbid me from feeding the kids in the car because it stinks so bad. Yes, that's right. On the floor you'll find smooshed up pretzels, crackers, raisins and maybe even an old apple. Yes, it's that gross. But feeding my kids in the car keeps them quiet.

Back in the day, my car was filled with toys for the kids and reading material for me--just in case someone was sleeping when we got somewhere. I would call friends and write blog posts in the car. If I had an iPhone it would be my mini office, except for the smell of the forgotten milk bottle.

When they were little, I couldn't wait to get kids into the car after a long, exhausting trip anywhere, fought kids into carseats as they wriggled around resisting the buckle, rolled my eyes as everyone screamed because we waited too long to leave a place, and then rejoiced when we finally got out of the car at home. Sometimes taking a few minutes to just stand outside the car and take a very deep breath.

I load people in and out all day driving them to camp, school, classes and playdates. Before they were in school, we drove to playdates and sometimes just the mall. Hell, sometimes I just drove so at least everyone was strapped in and couldn't get hurt. But now they are old enough that the just LEAN into each other and it makes it yet another chore. I guess before that they just hurled toys at each other. So really, it's the same.

I am pleased to announce that I finally reclaimed my radio after 4 years. Somewhere around the time my son was one, he started to prefer The Wiggles, Sara Hickman or Laurie Berkner. And for almost 5 years that's what I heard when the car was in drive. But I finally put my foot down and said, "NO!" Sometimes Mommy needs her own music.

The car (Ok this the third car in 5 years--blame it on moving) has seen many car seats and heard many fights. My kids have been fighting since the day they both could talk. Ok, even before that. The car seems too loud to me and I often wish I had a minivan so they were at least THAT much farther away from me (and my ears).

But at least I'm not driving a stick anymore. Nothing is worse with a Bunch than learning (yes, learning) to drive a stick with an 18-month old and a 2 month old. Phone ringing, bottles dropping, toy throwing...all while trying to change gears. Not a pretty sight. 

The car is difficult for me to understand. I use it now to get from point A to point B and sometimes we have great discussion and a good time. But really, now, I prefer to walk. It just seems so much easier.

Do you love your car trips, too?

baby bunching it in the car: 3 carseats across

Almost two years ago, I did something I swore I would never do:  buy a minivan.  It sucks because this over-sized, unwieldy, un-sexy vehicle is also undeniably convenient when you happen to have small children.  At the time, I drove a zippy little Honda CR-V that I absolutely adored,but it was becoming increasingly frustrating for me to fit our Bunch, their double stroller and assorted diaper bags, and my Costco runs into the vehicle, so we caved on the van front.  Although our minivan is incredibly spacious and convenient, it is neither zippy nor little.  To this day, I experience a twinge of sadness each morning when I watch my husband pull out of the driveway in the CR-V and I revel in doing my weekend errands where I get to "downsize" to the CR-V.  Yeah, my life is kinda pathetic like that.

ANYWAY, there are some intrepid souls that are determined to Baby Bunch without the assistance of a minivan and my hat is off to them.  We recently got a question from a friend who is looking to purchase "a good city car that will fit 3 car seats." Linda and I were at an absolute loss as to what such a car might be, so we thought we'd throw it out to you, gentle readers.  Anyone got any suggestions?

I will say that for a time, we were able to fit 3 car seats across our CR-V (which is built on a Civic chassis) while our youngest was in the infant seat.  Once he moved to a convertible, it became impossible for his older brother to access the seat belt for his booster. Linda can kind of sqeeze 3 seats across in her RAV-4, bu she has the same problem of getting everyone in unless two of the seats are boosters. I do know someone who was able to fit 3 across a sedan by changing to Sunshine Radian car seats, which are a little narrower.  A bit of research has told us that a Honda Accord and Toyota Camery do a good job of putting all three kids next to each other, but with the way cars changes, we're not 100% if that's still true. All that to say, sometimes "fitting" isn't just about the car, it's also about the seats (which, while not cheap, are cheaper than buying a new car!).

Speak up, city dwelling Baby Bunchers - got any suggestions for our urban mama?

doing the carseat shuffle

I finally managed to wrestle both kids into the car after their normal car nonsense (usually 5 minutes of hurling themselves in the back or turning on all the lights). As I was strapping my youngest in I realized she was starting to look a bit big for her car seat. Uh oh! I knew she was nearing the 40 pound limit for the seat, but now I noticed the straps were a bit too low and her ears were nearing the top of the seat. (Britax's benchmark for an outgrown car seat.)

In Baby Bunching there are three big purchases that are usually need to be made--and made strategically. We’ve touched a bit on cribs/big kid beds and talked a lot about double strollers. One area we haven’t talked much about is the car seat. I bring this up now because I’m about to make what I believe will be my final car seat purchase for a long time. (Note: I'm a little sad about this.)  

With kids farther apart in age, you may have a bit of wiggle room on your car seat purchases. But with kids close in age, the decision has to be made quicker and perhaps a bit more strategically. Car seats are expensive and can take up excess room if you live in small quarters or drive a smaller car like we do.

When my first child started to near the weight limit on his infant bucket seat, I immediately felt the need to bump him up to a more comfortable ride. Enter the convertible car seat. But my poor second child had limbs hanging over her infant seat before I was ready to give in and move her. Why? Because infant seat meant she was transferable from car to home, home to car, car to shopping cart, etc. Once she was out the seat, I would be left with two kids to contend with in parking lots or even in my own foyer.

My youngest was just about nine months old when I realized the infant seat was just WAY too small for her physique. Of course, she outgrew that bucket seat right about the time that Alex started a preschool where I had to walk him in (up a snowy hill) everyday. Super convenient. Moving her up to the convertible car seat meant I had to look into buying another one since my oldest was only two at the time. 

So what car seat would give us the most bang for our buck with two kids so close in age?

There are a plethora of car seats out there and even more since I had to make the decision. But I wanted this car seat purchase be the next to the last I would have to make. My current car seat was a Britax Roundabout. I cannot say enough good stuff about this car seat. Mostly the ease of getting it in and out of the car was a huge factor as was the fact that it was so easy to adjust and buckle. But buying another Roundabout would mean I would have to eventually buy two more car seats since seats only fit kids up to 40 pounds. I wasn’t interested (at the time) of purchasing the larger Britax Marathon although in retrospect, I wished I had. Instead I bought a Cosco convertible (which also converts to a booster later). Besides the fact that it is damn near impossible to get in the car without a lot of cursing from me as I do it, it’s been an OK car seat for us. 

So currently the configuration goes: big kid in Cosco seat, little kid in Britax Roundabout. But soon, my youngest will inherit the Cosco seat from her big brother as we move him up to a high-back booster.

So my tip to you Baby Bunchers making your next car seat purchase. Do some research into one that will take you through a few years. If your kids are close in age, it may be more difficult to just 'hand down' the older car seat. Some shuffling may be required. Buying one that will take you through the toddler and preschool years might be a good investment.

Check out Car-Seat.org which has its own blog dedicated only to car seats, along with tons of reviews from parents and experts and tips for what might work best for your kids, family and car.

Let us know how about your car seat selection for your Bunch.

by the time we put on our seatbelts...

Once upon a time, long time ago, before children, I used to laugh when Cara’s mom would say “if we’re going to get there by 5, then we have to be ready to go at 4. By the time we get out the door and put on our seatbelts and drive there . . . “ 

STOP! Put on our seatbelts? How freakin’ long does it take to put on seatbelts and why does it need its own line item?

This cracks me up now, only for different reasons. Seatbelts take a long, long time to get on in my house. And even longer if it’s cold outside. And sure enough when getting everyone to school in the morning, I have to factor in about 8 full minutes of getting everyone into the car and putting on seatbelts.

I wish I could say this was a new thing, but the first winter we spent in Sweden (Alex was about 20 months and Anna was 4) I spent months fighting with him about keeping his jacket while in the car seat. Why? It wasn’t that I really cared about him having it on in the car. It was the added step of taking it off before getting into the seat and putting it on after—all while balancing my baby and some other ad hoc items. I was soon known to just sprint from the mall/grocery store with him unjacketed (bad mom!) just to avoid the fight. Who knew that four years later I’d be having this same fight with both kids!

The car seat battle is a daily one…often more than once a day. Both kids get in at their pace. They don’t want you to put them in the car, they must climb in themselves. Sometimes there are limbs still sticking out of the car while they’re getting in. They’ll find a cool toy on the floor or hang from the handle. They especially like to do this when it’s raining,and I’m still standing outside getting wet and cold while trying to herd them in. Then they climb into the car. Sometimes they are hanging upside down from their car seats. Yes, they actually really do this. Sometimes they turn on all the interior lights. Sometimes they jump into the back part of the car. Super fun. 

Once they are in their seats, you’d think we’d be almost there. If they are wearing summer clothes, then we are. Both kids get in, buckle themselves in on their own, and we’re good. (Reminder: it did take us 8 minutes to get from the door to this point.) If it’s cold out, and they have sweaters, coats, rain jackets, etc., that somehow necessitates them shedding layers for our very brief journey. This is super fun when it’s raining like today because when we get to our destination, I have to stand there in the rain and negotiate which pieces of outwear need to be on. All of them!

I was sure this car loading and unloading would get easier with time. It hasn’t. I think actually prefer when everyone is just strapped in and can’t do and undo their own car seats.