thinking about round three?

Having recently had my third child 3 years after my Baby Bunch (which had a 17 month gap between the two of them), I continue to be astounded at what a different experience it is this time around the block.  This has been a surprise to me because I am so psychologically scarred from the last time.  Certainly, some things are the same.  For example, as I write this, my husband is walking circles around our house at midnight trying to quiet a fussy newborn that has been cluster feeding since 5 pm and finally succeeded in numbing both his mother's arms and her breasts.  This has been going on for almost a week now and I had forgotten how we did the same thing with our second son, but how quickly it all comes rushing back!

But in honor of the many of you who have commented that your Bunch is approaching pre-school/kindergarten age and you are on the fence about whether or not to have a third, I thought I'd share some of the things that are WAY easier this time than last.

Problem:  Late to church again and no time to nurse!   Throw bottle of pumped milk into diaper bag, only to have baby wig out as soon as you get in the car.
Solution Then: Unsuccessfully try to contort yourself enough to reach from front seat to back and feed baby while you are all buckled in.  Give up, letting baby scream all the way to church.
Now: Ask 4 year old in carseat next to baby to hold bottle and enjoy ride in silence while happy baby eats.

Problem: Baby is fussy. 
Solution Then:  Swing, bouncy, sling, cradle, and every other contraption in the house have been unsuccessful in soothing/distracting baby.  Give up, letting baby scream until he will likely wake up his (not much) older sibling.  Deal with two crying babies.
Solution Now: Get baby front row seats to the Big Brother Show.  Baby stops crying to watch (with great interest) the psychotic monkeys that are his older brothers.  Caveat:  This solution ends when big brothers go to bed, leaving mom and dad screwed from 8 pm until whenever baby wears himself out.

Problem: It is a hassle to go anywhere.  Every outing involves five trips to the car - one carrying each Baby in the Bunch and three more carrying their assorted diaper bags, strollers, and mom's coffee.
Solution Then:  Make five trips (on both ends) to the car anytime you go anywhere. 
Solution Now:  Grab infant seat and go.  Big brothers walk to the car themselves,with the oldest carrying mom's coffee.  Mom has downsized from an actual diaper bag to one of those diaper changing wallets, which she can snap on to the side of the infant seat.  Four different kinds of strollers have already taken up permanent residence in the car trunk, so Mom is prepared for any kind of outing scenario.

I'm sure there are more, but screaming baby has returned and duty calls.  Too bad big brothers won't be up for another 7 hours.  But hey, I promised y'all I'd focus on the POSITIVES of adding to your bunch, right?

Comments

[Justice Jonesie]

This is so true! Although my bunch were my last two, I always had Oldest to help me with the bottles, entertainment, or whatever. He had double duty for a little while, poor guy!

[Alecia]

I love this! I bookmarked it and showed it to my hubby. We're still on the fence about #3, but it definitely gives us new perspective on some of our fears.

[Amy]

I am due to have my 3rd in about 7 weeks. This baby (a girl!) will have two very active older brothers to keep her entertained. Since my two boys are 18 months apart, the oldest had no clue what having a sibling meant. Sure, we read the big brother books and talked about his sibling to be, but looking back, it was just me going through the motions of preparing my oldest for a little brother. Now when I read the books again, my boys, now 3 and 4 1/2, seem to "get it". I know there will be adjustment for all of us, especially my youngest, but I for one am so tickled for my boys to have someone to share their love and craziness with--and believe me they have so much to spare!!

[jenni]

Number two is still cooking, but I was thinking we'd try for our third when number one went to kindergartend or so. Sounds like that's not such a bad idea.

[jenni]

And thanks for the link!

[MammaLoves]

I did mine in the opposite order. First son then a six year gap and then two more boys 21 months apart. I do have to say that by your third you're so much more relaxed. I think by then you know that they are much more resilient than you did with your first.

On thing about a third though--my childless brother's observation:

When you go from two to three you change your defense from man-to-man to zone.

So true.